Friday, April 28, 2017

Shit MFD Said Vol 40

I don't care if it's blurry. I love it. My Geege looks like an old man boy.

Chicken cooking
MFD: I think that smells done.
Me: It's not done.
MFD: It is.
Me: If you'd like to get salmonella you can certainly eat it.
MFD: I've had salmonella. No big deal.

Flipping through the channels at the shore and finding a COPs marathon
MFD: ahhh, the mother lode.

In the car
MFD: I thought I had nail clippers in here. Do you have any in your purse?
Me: This isn't funny.
MFD: I did think I had some in here.

MFD: Steph. Do you want  to go Coachella?
Me: Why the fuck would I want to go to Coachella?
MFD: So you can wear those headbands everyone wears and take selfies.
Me: No.

Steepling his fingers at a traffic light
MFD: I think there's a conspiracy in our house.
Me: What do you mean?
MFD: I think someone is conspiring against me to hide all the nail clippers.
Me: Why are you talking to me about fucking nail clippers? Are you doing this on purpose?
MFD: They're like socks. They disappear.
Me: I don't care.

Me: Why do you rinse out the dishwasher cover and leave it in the sink so it can't dry and be used again? It makes me want to murder.
MFD: Well you know...sometimes you have to die.

After he got home from being out
Me: I shattered the pepper shaker tonight.
MFD: Was there pepper everywhere?
Me: Of course!
MFD: That's why I'm sneezing.
Me: You weren't even home and it was in the kitchen not out here.
MFD: It's in the atmosphere.

All read and approved by MFD before they go live...
Shit MFD Said Vol 1Shit MFD Said Vol 2Shit MFD Said Vol 3Shit MFD Said Vol 4
Shit MFD Said Vol 5Shit MFD Said Vol 6Shit MFD Said Vol 7Shit MFD Said Vol 8
Shit MFD Said Vol 9Shit MFD Said Vol 10Shit MFD Said Vol 11, Shit MFD Said Vol 12, Shit MFD Said Vol 13, Shit MFD Said Vol 14, Shit MFD Said Vol 15, Shit MFD Said Vol 16, Shit MFD Said Vol 17, Shit MFD Said Vol 18, Shit MFD Said Vol 19, Shit MFD Said Vol 20, Shit MFD Said Vol 21, Vol 22, Vol 23, Vol 24, Vol 25, Vol 26, Vol 27, Vol 28, Vol 29, Vol 30, Vol 31, Vol 32, Vol 33, Vol 34, Vol 35, Vol 36, Vol 37, Vol 38, Vol 39


  1. Oh the saga of the nail clippers continues - I'm surprised that your friends have not started to send /bring you them when they come over LOL! xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

  2. Hahaha oh the nail clippers. He needs them on one of the retractable pieces you can add to your key chain so he always as them.

  3. Nail clippers Jmj. His nails must grow fast. Lol. A happy way to start the day❣️
    TGIF ❣️ Happy weekend to all ❣️
    Love. Your. Momma

  4. Two nail clipper stories! Ha! I think he's doing it on purpose now.

  5. I'm picturing the day you move a piece of furniture and HOARDES of nail clippers are behind it. It's the only reasonable explanation.

  6. The nail clipper saga will never get old.
    I, too, have a professional chef that lives in my house and tells me when food is done (30 minutes premature).

  7. LOL at the nail clippers conspiracy and the pepper being in the atmosphere! And headbands and selfies for Coachella... hilarious!

  8. Coachella!!!!!!!!!! haha. I cannot stop laughing at that one. You two are hilarious. Thanks for the laughs.

  9. The nail clipper saga is too funny! "Why the fuck would I want to go to Coachella?" Truer words were never spoken, preach it MFD! Have a good weekend!

  10. The question is why does HE want to go to Coachella - she HE want to wear the headbands? ;)
    He needs a shirt that says "I had Salmonella"

  11. OMG THE GODDAMN NAIL CLIPPERS. Haha also I'd rather pull all my teeth out with pliers than go to Coachella.

  12. THE NAIL CLIPPERS: my fav!!! I would have the exact same reaction as you to going to Coachella. No showers/beds=No Heather.

  13. Oh my gosh, the Coachella one is hilarious!!!

  14. There needs to be a Go Fund Me for MFD but instead of money, it's just all your blog friends pledging to send a pair of nailclippers. I bet people would do it.

  15. Again with all the nail clippers! And I can't believe that he said that about the chicken!

  16. Losing their's what men do best. I can totally NOT see you dressed in a coachella outfit so his random suggestion is hilarious!

  17. I love these posts. It always seems to pop up at just the right time when I need a good laugh and distraction. Which is usually after I had a wicked nightmare. Last night I had found the hidden treasure but I had to keep it a secret and lie to everyone. Incidentally I started a new job, and although it is totally okay to have a second or third job along with the job/career I am at presently, I am not broadcasting the fact that I have a new job to anyone at work.
    The nail clippers cracked me up! You guys seem to have a lot of fun at your house.

  18. As always, I am cracking up. Matt asked me to buy him new nail clippers at the grocery store today. I asked him what happened to his old ones and he said he lost them. Where do they go?!?!

  19. Lol, love it! The nail clippers got a laugh from me. I think I currently own 5 nail clippers for 2 people because someone can't even find it.

    7% Solution

  20. I laugh so hard I start to tear up every time I see the mention of nail clippers in an MFD post. I can't even handle it.


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