Wednesday, May 4, 2016

Shit MFD Said Vol 29



Fiddling with the Roku

Me: Press Start here.
MFD: Do I press begin now?
Me: That's what I said. 
MFD: No, you said start here.
Me: Same thing!
MFD: No.

Always looking for dollar bills in our house 
Me: I actually have a lot of ones right now.
MFD: What, did you go to a strip club?
Me: What? I...no.

On a chilly spring day
MFD: It's cold. Right Gussie? Maybe put the heat on?
Me: The heat is on.
MFD: Really? Who are you, Glenn Frey or something? 
Me: Why?
MFD: singing the heat is on...the heat is onnn. The heat is on ooh it's on the streets
Me: I get it now.

Yelling up the stairs
MFD: Hey Steph?
Me: What?
MFD: I uh, happened to notice there was some chocolate brought home from a shower on Sunday? Where would that chocolate be now?
Me: I don't know what you're talking about. 
MFD: Yeah. Chocolate. In clear coffee mugs. 
Minutes later
MFD: Did you take it to work?
Me: Yes. There might be some in the basement. 
MFD: What?
Minutes later
MFD: Was that like a wild goose chase you sent me on?
Me: You actually looked?
MFD: Yes.

Purger vs. hoarder
Me: When can you go to Goodwill?
MFD: For what?
Me: To drop off all the stuff I'm getting rid of.
MFD: Wait! Books! We can take them to the shore. 
Me: Paperbacks only.
MFD: James Patterson! Robert Frost! 
Me: Mike. No.
MFD: I want to read them all.
Me: Here. Read this Henry James book. Go ahead. Read the first paragraph. 
He reads it
MFD: Maybe not that one. Definitely the rest.
Me: You know what? I think I'll just go to Goodwill.

MFD: Did you see Steve's glasses?
Me: No.
MFD: The funeral director's glasses were cool too. 
Me: Were they? I didn't see.
MFD: I want new glasses. I don't think I have the coolest glasses anymore.

Fitting day for a Shit MFD Said given MFD's devotion to Star Wars. May the Fourth be with you.


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All read and approved by MFD before they go live...
Shit MFD Said Vol 1Shit MFD Said Vol 2Shit MFD Said Vol 3Shit MFD Said Vol 4
Shit MFD Said Vol 5Shit MFD Said Vol 6Shit MFD Said Vol 7Shit MFD Said Vol 8
Shit MFD Said Vol 9Shit MFD Said Vol 10Shit MFD Said Vol 11, Shit MFD Said Vol 12, Shit MFD Said Vol 13, Shit MFD Said Vol 14, Shit MFD Said Vol 15, Shit MFD Said Vol 16, Shit MFD Said Vol 17, Shit MFD Said Vol 18, Shit MFD Said Vol 19, Shit MFD Said Vol 20, Shit MFD Said Vol 21, Vol 22, Vol 23, Vol 24, Vol 25, Vol 26, Vol 27, Vol 28



35 comments:

  1. I say this every time but these are my favorite! When he went looking for the chocolate - so funny! xo, Biana -BlovedBoston

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  2. These are always my fave posts. The chocolate one is def my fave!

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  3. Hahah I love the one about the chocolate...poor guy really had a craving!! Happy Star Wars day!!

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  4. the glenn frey one - that made me LOL hard. i could just imagine your face as he started singing that.

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  5. I have little May the Fourth Be With You bookmarks to hand out today...even though I'm "that" person who's not a fan of Star Wars. Oh well.

    And buttons on remotes and machines, etc. have meaning. That's why wording is important.

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  6. I love the trip-up with the dollar bill hunt :) And his dedication to finding the chocolate!! Haha!

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  8. Henry James, ha! I could never get past the first paragraph either! Who can?

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  9. Poor guy had a craving for chocolate and just couldn't get it satisfied...

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  10. Hahahaha!!! I just had a convo with someone about reading the other day. I'm like "you read"?!!! He said ya like I was crazy but I know better.

    You sent him to the basement!!!! LOL.
    On a side note, I haven't been able to comment on your blog for the longest but I have still been reading them. Come to find out it has something to do with my work computer and it works perfectly fine from home.

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  11. After I read this I went to the kitchen and got some fudge! LMAO, I love the two of you

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  12. LMAO... Purger v. hoarder... Purger FTW... with her stripper bills!

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  13. The Glenn Frey comment made me LOL hard.

    Scott hasn't said anything extra bizarre lately. He's done some weird things. But his comments have been relatively normal. I feel like he's storing them up for a special occasion.

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  14. I sent Mike Doyle a 4th text earlier this morning. Love all of these. Favorite- $1's from the strip club! Lol lol literally! This one is in the top ten best! Have a happy day. Love. Your. Momma.

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  15. Sending him after candy that's not there, that's kind of like having a kid. Hahaha

    When Tyson brings home one's from work and I go to the store with them I wonder if the cashier thinks I'm a stripper.

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  16. Great... I have Glenn Fry stuck in my head now

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  17. Henry James and other books one was forced to read in college don't make for the best beach reads. And you can't talk about dollar bills without stripper jokes... they just always happen.

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  18. I mean, I would go search out chocolate in the house too!!! That is too funny about the books, clearly if you dont take them none of them will be gone!

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  19. Cracking up at so many of these today!!

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  20. Haha! I love that he actually went downstairs to look for chocolate, and that he agreed with you about some of those books after reading the first paragraph!

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  21. "Yeah, in clear coffee mugs" he was really eyeing those up lol! I hide chocolate from Blue all the time, but it works because then it's there when she "needs" it. Love the singing one too- there's a lot of that in my house as well!

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  22. I love the book one lol. "Well maybe not that one..."

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  23. Cracking up that he went looking for chocolate in the basement....defintiely a wild goose chase. Lol @ his strip club comment.

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  24. The heat is on!!! So funny.

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  25. I'd do the same thing re: the chocolate. When I lived with my parents I remember the FURY I'd feel when I was expecting leftover desserts/treats and they were gone. You guys are too much :)

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  26. Hahaha I love the chocolate one! I'd do the same thing to my hubs!

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  27. As soon as I see the title I go YESSSSSSS! The heat is onnnnnn for the wild goose chase for chocolate! And lol at the strip club!

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  28. Oh, gosh. I think I laughed more than I should. :P

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  29. I love these posts! The wild goose chase for chocolate was probably my favorite this time though!

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  30. hahaha the glasses. You definitely have to have the coolest glasses, MFD. Get on that.

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  31. That Glenn Frey exchange...that's same A+ stuff right there.

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  32. Oh I love these posts! The chocolate story made me laugh

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  33. I was totally humming the heat is on after that one! Dang it!

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  34. the heat is on! haha yes.
    and the purger vs hoarder. KC is such a hoarder even though he says he isn't. everything has a use when it's going to goodwill but not when it's just sitting around collecting dust.

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