Failure and fire and no one likes us and we don't care

image via 6abc Action News, the only news in town

Philly's been in the news a lot this week. If you haven't heard, our football team won the Super Bowl. 

The majority of the after stories focused on destructive assholes who celebrated by destroying shit. 

Who does that? Well, assholes in every city, unfortunately. Not according to the Internet, though. The Internet would like to pin assholes squarely on Philly. We’re used to it.

So even for non-fans like me, it's been an awesome but oddly defensive feeling week.

On failure making us who we are and being a common denominator for all of us regardless of life status, here is the speech of Super Bowl MVP Nick Foles. True, humble, relatable. 

Failure comes for all of us, big and small fails, fails only we know about and fails that are visible to many. When failure comes, you’ve got to get up and grow from it. Be you, do you, work hard, have your own back, and don't look outside for validation because when you look outside for validation, you will let doubt and shame from the outside creep in too. You don't need that shit. Just keep going.

Then there’s Jason Kelce's speech, delivered in an Avalon Stringband Mummer suit and fired up with the F bomb - mummers, Eagles, F bomb is like a Philly trifecta - that will live in infamy in this city. True, fire, relatable. Up there on the Art Museum steps, Jason Kelce is Rocky after he’s been told he can’t win. Jason Kelce is all of us. 

It’s hard to explain Philly to people. That speech and this little ditty, sung by Kelce and Celek and fans along the parade route but certainly not new to this city, both do a good job of giving you the feel of our culture. 

No one likes us, no one likes us, no one likes us,

We don’t care

WE'RE FROM PHILLY FUCKING PHILLY 

NO ONE LIKES US, WE DON'T CARE

There's a lot to be said for not caring what people think. You can be out there living like Jesus and Mother Teresa combined and people will still think what they want of you, and say what they will. They’ll find shit to talk about because some people just like to talk shit. It’s fine. It’s the way of the world. If you're a good person, you’re a good person. 

I still don't give two shits about the NFL and would take a knee with Colin Kaepernick any day of the week and twice on Sundays, but I love the hell out of people with fire and heart and I love the underdog. This Eagles team has fire and heart, they’re all up there on the stage as Super Bowl champions barking like dogs in front of God and the world while giving zero shits, and quite a few of them have a social conscious to boot. 

This city has fire and heart. We identify as underdogs - we think Rocky is a real person from this town and screw you if you say it’s just a movie. We are working class people; a city of neighborhoods; people with a cultural tendency for bluntness that is often mistaken for rudeness; people who care more about what’s in your heart and what's real than how polished you are; people who are more apt to roar like lions behind those who speak from the heart even if it's a little messy and not conventionally classy; people who might curse more than you like but would give you the shirt off their back in a second. We work hard, play hard, and love hard. 

If the world wants to lump us all in with the few who destroy shit and rocket bottles at people, it’s fine. We know what we are, and it’s not that. 

And if you don’t like us, we don’t care. You can already buy a shirt for this occasion. If you recall, I bought another version at the Cheesesteak Festival in 2015. 

Yo. Happy Friday from Philly.

On my 40th: My Top 10 Rules for Living

Today I turn 40. I am a rule maker and follower, a mantra lover, a quote sharer. Today I forced myself to whittle it down to share only my top 10 rules for living.

1. Never work on your birthday, even if it falls in the middle of the week. I don't care what's going on, take the day off and spend it doing exactly what you want. It doesn't have to be glamorous or exciting, just what you want to do. That can be nothing at all. But for me, doing exactly what I want to do always includes not working for someone.

2. Cultivate your mental toughness. Bad things will happen to you and around you. You can't fall apart at the drop of a hat.

3. Do not rely on others to make you happy or center you. Know how to get to those places yourself.

4. Work first, play later. You'll be more free in play because there's nothing left to get done. Along those lines, know the difference between "must do" and "bonus do."

5. Protect and nurture your circle. Not everyone is going to want, accept, or know how to receive your energy. We are not designed for everyone to like us. Don't get butt hurt over it and don't obsess about it. The people who don't get you don't matter. Make your emotional investment in the people who do get you. Those are your people. They are your family, regardless of blood relation.

6. Maintain an attitude of gratitude. Even when things are bad, there's always a silver lining. Find it even when you have to look hard.

7. Spend a little time outside every day. Get out of your own head.

8. Stand up for what you believe in even if people tell you to sit down or if it means you're standing alone. Live in accordance with your values, serve your conscience, make sure your integrity cannot be bought, and fuck what everyone else thinks.

9. Practice self-care, and not just when someone reminds you to. Putting everyone else before yourself is not noble or admirable. It's foolish. You're worth the time and effort. If you don't do it, you run out of gas and aren't any good to yourself or anyone else.

10. Go into situations with no expectations. If it's awesome, it'll be a bonus. If it sucks, you were prepared for that. Hope for the best, expect the worst. And whenever there's a worst, let that shit go.

My original 40th birthday plans included bumming around at the shore and being carefree and not wearing a huge down jacket. March storm Stelllllaaaaaa had other plans, so I'll roll with it. I can spend MFD's 40th birthday doing what I planned to do for mine. I can stretch this birthday celebration to September, right?

What else? Oh yes, beware the Ides of March, of course. Always.

10 Items of Note for my Teenage Self

I’m not a person who would like to go back and erase every bad choice or mistake I’ve made. I believe that our reaction to mistakes and fuck ups shape who we are and that every choice we make, good or bad, leads us to where and who we are right now. And I'd never change that.

I also know that sometimes you have to touch the fire to know it burns. Even if Current Me told Teenage Me these things, Teenage Me would give Current Me the finger and keep on doing what she was doing. That being said, if I was going to tell my teenage self some things, these would be those things.

1. Keep that Polaroid camera you got when you were 11. You’ll really want it when you’re 36 and it will cost eleventy billion dollars which you will have a hard time justifying.
2. Remember: people who talk shit are simply shit talkers.
3. Spend as much time as you can with your grandparents. Talk to them about what it was like when they were young. Soak up the time you have with them.
4. Savor every second of not working, having bills, or being responsible for anything.
5. All things end: good and bad. Appreciate what you have when you have it and hang in there when you don’t. 
6. Whatever qualifies as a huge deal now will not even be on your radar in 10 years. It’s not worth the angst or the stress.
7. Record every single episode of Beverly Hills 90210. Never get rid of your VCR.
8. In regards to college: don’t eat and drink whatever you want, study abroad
9. In regards to college: Go to a state college. You’ll save a ton of money. Better yet, go to a community college for a year or two, then a state college.
10. These are not the best years of your life as some people will tell you – but if you make it a goal to have the best time of your life every year, then you’ll always technically be in the best time of your life.

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Haikuesday

Advice. I have some.

Teenagers say "no thanks" though

Bastards would take cash.

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Speaking of teenage selves, happy happy birthday to one of my favorite friends since we were teenagers friends - Frank!

What would you tell your teenage self?

Linking up with Jana, and you should too!

Do what you can.

My best friend dresses up in costumes for sick kids. My husband gives rides to a homeless vet working two jobs and trying to get his head above water. An artist friend of ours just donated his time and talent for a bedroom makeover for a little girl diagnosed with leukemia.

The world is full of people who need help, and people who can give it. We're not all comfortable with the same level of giving and that's okay. As long as you give something - time, talent, money, whatever - you're comfortable with giving when someone needs it and look for nothing in return except a good feeling in your soul, you're a good human being in my book.

I think we're experiencing a bit of a giving backlash. Too often we politicize giving. It's a liberal thing! Or we feel inundated with requests for donations and we just turn them all down. We start to judge who's really deserving and who's not. We don't want to deal with large corporations and their charity machines. Avoiding all of these things is easy. Open your eyes...there are people all around you that need help. Think less, help more, and if you don't publicize it no one can politicize it. We live in our own heads too much sometimes.

Sometimes the people in need are people you know, and sometimes they're not. Need is need. Help when you can. But don't help just so you can pat yourself on the back and get praise. That's lame. If someone shows you kindness, pay it forward. If you're in a situation where you can't, wait until you can. There's no time limit on doing good. 

The world runs on those who are not afraid to reach out and lift up people around them. I'm glad to know so many of them and to be one when I can. I think it's cool that something so small on my part can make such a great difference in the life of someone else. I hope you do too. It makes the world a better place.

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Haikuesday:

be a friend to friends

and to strangers, sometimes too

kindness changes lives

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Are you into random acts of kindness? Check Kerry out at Till Then, Smile Often. Her Be the Change project rocks.

10 Things I do to make Life Easier in the Kitchen

1. I put tinfoil in a bowl before I drain the grease from bacon. I throw it out or freeze it if I'm going to use it to cook with at another time. I don't need to worry about a gross bowl.

2. I prepare food on Sundays: breakfast, lunch, dinner, snacks. I'm cleaning up for an hour or two one day versus every morning and night. I leave the house by 7 and get home at 6. I do not feel like cooking every night. Being prepared gives me no excuse for eating shitty processed meals. That being said, some weekends we're away or I'm too busy to do that. So I always have some meals in the freezer ready to heat and eat: quiche (pieces frozen individually), breakfast burritos, baked ziti, enchiladas, mexican stuffed shells, soup.

3. If a recipe calls for half an onion, I chop the rest of it and freeze it. Likewise, if I only need a tablespoon or two of tomato paste, I freeze the rest of the can in ice cube trays and to use at my leisure. No haste, no waste, and since I usually add them to sauce or soup, no defrosting. I hate wasting food. There are too many people in this world who don't have that luxury.

4. As soon as I use the last of something, I grab my phone and write it down on a list under the Grocery Note I keep in the notes. I check that when I'm making my grocery or Target lists. I've been shopping more at Target using my red card for a 5% discount plus the Cartwheel app, Target mobile coupons, and real live coupons.

5. Wear gloves when doing dishes. Do you think these nails keep themselves? I buy fun gloves at Homegoods to put a shine on a shit chore.

6. I separate bananas when I bring them home - it keeps them good longer.

7. I never buy buttermilk because it would go bad before I'd use it all. If I need it, I add a tablespoon of lemon juice to a cup of milk, stir, and let stand for 10 minutes. Viola - you made buttermilk, bitches.

8. I whisk eggs in a four cup measuring cup so they're easy to pour out.

9.  I don't peel carrots, cucumbers, or potatoes. Again, I hate wasting food and more importantly wasting nutrients. Most nutrients in carrots are in or just below the skin. Scrub those bitches and cut the ends off and boom, you're good to go. Cucumber peel is a good source of fiber. Potato skin has a ton of finber and vitamins - it's full of vitamin K, potassium, copper, and iron. So if you eat over and we're having potato salad or mashed potatoes, expect the skin.

10. I always have a box of brownie mix in the pantry and a few bags of frozen berries in the fridge. If I have to make a dessert on the fly to serve to impromptu dinner guests or bring to a spontaneous gathering, brownies and berry cobbler will do nicely.

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Haikuesday

Share your kitchen tips!

Ordering out tricks work too.

Please, no tips on beets. 

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Tomorrow: our weekend in Mexico. Hasta manana, amigos.

When it comes to weight loss, let's go back to basics.

A good Saturday to you, dear reader. A while back I asked people to let me know what they wanted to see on this blog, and one of the answers was fitness stuff. I am not a guru on that, so I went straight to the source, my friend Kathy at Vodka and Soda. Kathy fucking rocks and she's really knowledgeable about fitness, clean eating, and weight loss. She totally kicks ass. And uses the term fitness boner to describe when work out things go awesome so hello you know you'll love her, sickos. So sit back, relax, and enjoy. And follow her on her blog, she's been doing Fitness Fridays. Get your fitness fix from the source. 

Visit Kathy at Vodka & Soda / Twitter / Instagram

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Hello amazing readers of Life According to Steph! I’m Kathy and I blog over at Vodka and Soda.  I’m a 38 year old mother to an adorable and brilliant 5 year old, a total geek at heart (I work in the IT industry) and an avid lover of all things health and fitness.  Today, Steph was crazy enough to let me take over this space so we’re going to talk about something that gives me a major boner – fitness.  Listen up fast because I’m about to impart some mad wisdom in your faces.

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It’s the end of January and a lot of people have started weight loss challenges or making positive changes in their lives.  All of this – whether you’re a newbie or a guru – is awesome because any change, no matter how small it is, can make a difference.  And here’s where I get on my soapbox to say what needs to be said:    All that shit you read or hear on the TV/internet about this diet or that diet or juicing or detoxing or whatever – IGNORE IT.  It’s nothing but dumb marketing schemes put out by marketing companies who want nothing but to take your money.  Do not buy into their shit!

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In my personal opinion (and experience), when it comes to weight loss, we need to go back to the basics - no fancy blenders or juicers.  No powders or meal replacements or pills.  No diets that cut out major food groups or restrict food consumption.  No food that comes out of a box, bag or can - just the basic stuff:  fresh, wholesome food and exercise.  That’s it. 

There is no magic behind weight loss. Nothing that any marketing company can put out on the shelf will make you accelerate or burn fat any faster than your body will allow which is why I say to avoid all those fad diets and crazy machines – your body will burn fat if you return to the basics, make the right choices and exercise.  All you need to do start and then give it time to work.

And carbs – what is with all the demonizing of carbohydrates?  Time and time again, I read about women cutting out carbs because “that’s the reason i can’t lose weight.”  This is one of the biggest misconceptions of all! Carbs are NOT the reason why you can’t lose weight – bad choices are the reasons why one can’t lose weight.   Yes, carbs are caloric dense but are also is a great source of energy.  Cutting out carbs will do nothing but make you feel tired, miserable and crazy.  Our bodies need carbohydrates to function so instead of eating the white, starchy kinds, just select healthy alternatives like sweet potatoes, quinoa or whole grains. Eat them in controlled portions, eat within your caloric range for weight loss and you will lose inches and weight.

The biggest challenge for anyone wanting to lose weight is making the change; the starting point.  You’re now changing the way you eat and changing your daily routine which is instead of sitting on the couch, you get up and exercise. Who said change is easy?  It’s not!  Humans are naturally resistant to change because it’s different from what we do on a daily basis.  We also put too much pressure on ourselves to become fitness gurus or healthy in a couple of weeks when really, it takes at least a month to feel and see the changes.  Did you know that it takes humans on average 4 weeks to form new habits?  This means that we need to repeat an activity at approximately the same time every day for at least 4 weeks in order for it to become a habit.  So give yourself a break; if you’ve just started a healthy change or a new workout program, give yourself time to adjust and adapt.  Be patient.  Go back to the basics of clean eating and exercise.  Most of all, remember that it’s not the outside that only counts but what’s happening on the inside that counts most.

Are you currently working to make a healthy change in your life? 

Kathy - Vodka and Soda

Forgiveness

When you see the word forgiveness, what comes to mind? What feelings does it invoke?

For a good portion of my life, people who didn’t deserve my forgiveness came to mind. My brain started firing like a machine gun and my chest got tight. Why should I just forgive someone who wronged me? They should have to pay in some way. It should be something I can hang over their head, possibly for eternity. 

Every time I thought about the situation, my chest would begin to agitate like a washing machine. Back and forth between negativity and rage and sadness and then the spin cycle wrung me out and I was just washed out. It was a lot of work churning up all that negativity.

I used to think being forgiving showed weakness. Then I got my head out of my ass and realized the opposite is true – weak people hold on to their hurts and pride themselves on not forgiving. They make their hurts a part of them and blame their hurts for what's wrong in their lives. Weak people give their hurts all the power. It takes a strong person to be knocked down, to stand up again and not allow negativity to claim their lives. It takes a strong person to forgive. 

Forgiveness is not about absolution. You are not telling someone it's okay to mistreat you. Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace. Forgiveness has nothing to do with anyone besides you. 

When you don’t forgive, you carry the hurt. You grow bitter, resentful, and oversensitive. And when you've been fucked by life in general or are a victim of circumstance, what then? How do you get over it without forgiving it? There’s a reason being happy is infinitely easier than being locked in battle with yourself or someone else. Negative emotions take an incredible amount of energy to hold aloft. In order to hold a grudge, you have to keep bringing yourself down to a place of pain. 

When you do that, there’s no room for anything good and you're too tired to make good happen. You can’t grow as a person because you’re holding yourself back and living in the past.  In addition to being hurt, you’re stunting yourself. Not too smart, is it? 

I’d rather acknowledge that someone hurt me, accept it, say I forgive it and let it go. I’m not giving it any more space in my brain or my heart. I'm taking back the power. I choose what to expend my energy on, and it’s not going to be spent on bullshit or picking at old scabs. I won't hang on to or blame the past. I will own my present and make my future. I won't be a victim. I will be a fucking warrior. 

Sometimes while forgiving people I realize it’s not healthy for them to be in my life anymore so I give them the boot. Forgiving does not mean forgetting in some cases, and while people deserve a lot of chances, I don't think that number is limitless. However, more often forgiving someone leads to a better relationship between us. Everyone makes mistakes and hurts people they love, intentionally and unintentionally as well. If you’d want forgiveness from someone, you need to be someone who gives it to others. We all need mercy and we all need to show mercy at times. 

If you're holding on to old hurts right now, throw a private forgiveness party and kick that shit to the curb toot sweet. And the next time you come up against something painful, don’t hold on to it like it's a badge of honor. Process it as quickly as you can and move towards the positive. Don’t give someone else’s actions the power to dictate how you feel about yourself or how you live your life. Give yourself the gift of forgiveness. Take a deep breath and reclaim your power. 

Linking up with
Because Shanna Said So - Random Wednesday

36 Life Realizations from my 36 Years, Part II

Did you miss Part 1 last week?

1. Life is not fair. Get over it.

2. Everyone has a past. It's not a factor unless you allow it to be.

3. Guilt is a self-indulgent, useless emotion. Your time and energy would be better spent getting your head out of your ass and preparing to be a better person for the next time.

4. What other people think about you is none of your business.

5. Some people are not worth fighting for or with.

6. Time heals.

7. Excuses are for assholes. Don't make them.

8. If you see something you love at Marshalls/Homegoods, you need to buy it. Marshalls Law declares that it will not be there when you go back. 

9. Forgiveness benefits you, not them. Holding on to hate and hurt is not the way to live.

10. If you can't laugh at yourself, chances are people do not enjoy hanging out with you.

11. Anyone who judges people on how much or how little they drink is a tool.

12. No one is invincible.

13. Marriage is work and it can be hard. The issues you have before you get married are the issues you'll have after. Be prepared for something other than wine and roses.

14. Your ability to sleep deep and long is compromised as you get older. Enjoy it while it's still good.

15. Take pictures with real cameras, you'll be so glad you have those memories to look at when you get older.

16. There is an art to learning from your mistakes. Everything you do, right or wrong, shapes you. Work with the clay.

17. You are not entitled to anything you don't work for - the world doesn't owe you a thing.

18. The most important thing in your life is not your job, what you own, or what you earn - it's who you have sitting in your circle.

What did I miss?

Linking up with
Because Shanna Said So - Random Wednesday

36 Life Realizations from my 36 Years - Part I

Realizations I've come to along the way, part 1. 

1. The definition of success is not the same for everyone. Be proud of your accomplishments, no matter how big or small.

2. If a relationship has to be a secret, that relationship is fucked up in some way.

3. You are responsible for your own happiness. No one else. 

4.  Just because you can talk on the phone everywhere doesn't mean you should. People do not want to hear your one sided cell phone conversations on public transportation or in a restaurant or anywhere else, no matter how hilarious you believe you and your friend to be.

5. Clowns are bad fucking news. Avoid them. No good ever came from a clown. 

6. The things you spend 99% of your time worrying about will never happen. When something bad does happen, it's usually something it never occurred to you to worry about.

7. You see what people let you see - just because someone's life looks perfect doesn't mean it is. We all have our struggles - we're not required to put them on display, and we shouldn't if we can help it. Deal with your shit in private and be cognizant that others may appear fine but are doing the same.

8. It's infinitely more fun to be yourself than to conform to be cool.

9. You are not winning powerball. Get to work.

10. Someone will always be better than you at something, someone will always be worse than you at something. Someone will always have more than you and someone will always have less. Comparison is the thief of joy. Stop doing it. 

11. There is no trick to diet and exercise: eat real food 97% of the time, everything in moderation, and move your ass. 

12. All dating rules, advice, and games suck. Don't play them and always go with your gut. 

13. You are your own best encouragement, your own competition and your own worst nightmare: your choice. 

14. Ladies, you will get your period the one time you don't have a tampon. You will find yourself immediately saying to a friend/coworker/stranger I can't believe this, I always have a tampon.

15. Every problem you have is your responsibility to solve regardless of who caused it. Blame doesn't solve a fucking thing, it just wastes time. 

16. You are your most important relationship. If you don't take care of yourself, you aren't any good to anyone else. 

17. Miracles happen. You have to be open to them.

18. If you drop your expectations of other people and situations, you will have much less disappointment and much more joy.

Next Wednesday: part II. You're on the edge of your seat, aren't you pal?

Linking up with
Because Shanna Said So - Random Wednesday

Chasing the years of my life

I'm fifteen for a moment
Caught in between ten and twenty
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are 
I'm twenty two for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars 

And on the song goes…thirty three for a moment; forty five for a moment; another blink of an eye sixty seven is gone; ninety nine for a moment…

When I’m with my girlfriends I’ve known since junior high and high school, I still feel 17 in my brain. I rarely physically feel 23 anymore, particularly after a night of drinking, but still, it seems like it was just yesterday. Wasn’t my 30^th birthday last week? A few times recently I’ve gone to look for a photo in my snapfish online albums only to realize that event took place five years ago, not last year.

Everything goes so quickly, and sometimes that makes me feel melancholy. Mostly it serves as a reminder to open my eyes and look at the sky, to say screw the chores and finish the book instead, to linger over flowers instead of speed walking by them, to appreciate the places I find myself, and to focus on the people I’m sitting next to in those places. To be in the moment, to get off of my phone unless it’s to put something on Instagram (it’s called INSTA for a reason, you hear? Just kidding, not really). You know what I mean. To be there.

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Every once in a while I’m sort of startled by the fact that I’m 36, which prompts a gut check. An introspection session. How did I get here? What am I doing? Am I where I thought I would be?

The answer to that is no.

I was not ever interested in getting married, but it was important to a charming man who is important to me. I always thought I’d work on a college campus, and instead I’ve spent the past 14 years building a career in communications and marketing – a career full of great coworkers, bosses, opportunities, lessons, and successes – and I actually like what I do. In my early 20s I couldn't even make a good grilled cheese sandwich and didn’t care about anything domestic, and now I really love being in the kitchen and keeping a nice home. I never thought I’d have dogs that I treated like human family members. So many things are different than I thought they would be when I was 15, 18, even 21. I've taken roads I didn't think I'd take. When I took the wrong roads I beat a path through the underbrush and emerged onto another road with cuts and bruises from the journey. But I did emerge. 

So no, I’m not where I thought I’d be. I think I'm somewhere better than I imagined. My life is not even close to perfect. There are still a lot of changes to make in myself, in my relationships and in my environment. I am responsible for my own happiness. I will always be in a state of flux: constantly improving myself and my surroundings, inviting friends old and new to sit at my table, eradicating people and things that affect me negatively, tweaking my ways, learning, growing, changing, revising as I go. But most days, I truly like my life as it is. I'm grateful for everything. I could literally weep with joy at the quality of the people surrounding me. I'm proud of the life I've built for myself. And that is really a wonderful thing, to take stock of your life and to be content.

Life lessons A to Z

Happy Wednesday, worldwideweb! As part of my birthday month, I thought I'd share an A to Z of some things I've learned along the way in life. Enjoy! And try not to be a dbag today, to yourself or anyone else.

A. Actions speak louder than words. Do what you say you're going to do.

Photo from leloveimage.blogspot.com

B. Don't think so much. Just be. This is my favorite quote from the fabulous novel Ordinary People.

C. Comparison is the thief of joy. Appreciate what you have, don't worry about anyone else or what they have.

D. Don't drink and drive, and don't be an asshole drunk.

E. Excuses are lame.

F. Facebook is not a therapy office, nor is it a place to air dirty laundry. It's a social network. The End.

Photo from sanespaces.com

G. Graciously accept aging - some people don't have the privilege of growing old.

H. Honesty is the best policy.

Photo from letsbehonestdho.blogspot.com

I. If you don't love yourself, nothing else matters.

J. Jail is bad, so don't do anything that might land you there if you get caught, mm'kay?

K. Karma doesn't have a statute of limitations. Treat others how you want to be treated.

Photo from grazesandgroanswithlifesspillsandthrills.wordpress.com

L. Laughter cures most things. So do loving and loyal friends.

M. Manage your expectations of others and of situations and you will be happier overall and less bitter about things you never had any control over anyway.

N. NO DRAMA - don't create it and don't participate in it. It's like Beetlejuice. Don't even say it.

O. Own up to your part in things and take responsibility.

P. Play the best hand you can with the cards you've been dealt.

Q. Quit blaming other people for what's in your life. Whatever is there is there until you choose to get rid of it.

R. Race the sun - have productive and full days. You'll sleep better at night.

Photo from blog.wireguided.com

S. Stand up for what's right, especially when nobody else will.

T. Take vacations, enjoy every day, and have fun.

U. Use correct spelling and grammar.

No lie, I was fortunate enough to be behind this guy this very morning. Please sir, the possessive...you're killing me.

V. Vote. It's a privilege many people in the world don't have, and one of your freedoms that many soldiers died to protect. The least you could do is inform yourself about candidates and issues and pull the lever.

W. The world doesn't owe you anything, so check your sense of entitlement at the door. If you want something, you have to work for it.

Photo from themillionairesecrets.net

X. eXtremists are bad news and tend to ruin things.

Y. You can't control what other people do or say, but you can control your reaction to it.

Z. Zen states are good.


Sayonara, amigos.

SMD