Wednesday, September 18, 2019

How is this my life?

I've asked myself that question so many times with different emotional inflections in my inner voice. 

With exhaustion when things are too much. 

With disbelief when crazy shit happens.

With uncertainty in those really dark times when it seems like there is no light.

With rage when I have to deal with situations I don’t want to deal with. 

With disappointment when I’ve fucked something up and need to dig myself out of a hole. 

With frustration when things go wrong and set off a chain reaction of shit.

With resignation when there’s traffic late at night when there shouldn’t be. 

With gratitude for my framily. They make my whole life. 

With appreciation when something in the universe manifests exactly for me. 

With wonder when I realize that my life at the shore is actually my life. 

With a feeling of pure joy bubbling up in my chest when I think of how many things are so fucking good. 

The last four are my favorite. 

Happy birthday to Jen, my oldest friend. I've been friends with her since I was three. 

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