Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Ninjas and other Wednesday Things

To kick off Wednesday Things, I will discuss Tuesday. It must be done. I hate Tuesdays, always have, they suck the life out of the week and serve no purpose. So I am always surprised when I have a Tuesday that sort of rocks. Yesterday was one of them. Thank you Universe.

All of my Christmas shopping is done and everything is wrapped. Thank you tiny baby awful wrap job jesus for gift bags. Kiss my grits bitches!
You can walk on my kitchen floor again, and we have some walls. From what I hear, we also now have appliances. The rest of the house is still a fucking war zone. I cannot wait to put this all back together after the counter tops are installed on Saturday. When you exist in an orderly space and are plunged into chaos, it screws with your head. Plus my dogs are puking, pissing and pooping wherever they please to show their great displeasure with what's going on. Is this over yet? How do people do longer renovations?

Eleven days out from Christmas we have no tree, indoor or outdoor decorations. MFD, aka Clark Gris, is not happy. Saturday we are missing two holiday parties and a dinner invite from dear friends to set things to rights and make Clark's heart fill with the joy of the season.

MFD and I are hosting a Christmas Open House on 12/25, and I'm plotting the menu this week, which I love to do. If you're hosting Christmas or the Eve, what are you having? Are you trying anything new? I want to try some stuff I've pinned on pinterest or starred on my Google Reader.

Jalapeno Popper Dip, you've made the cut. Congratulations.
You can thank Jessica W. for the gold star after I pinned her pin on pinterest. Say that three times fast.  
The sky was so gorgeous this morning I almost got into an accident staring at it.

I watched a Storage Wars marathon last night. I love that show. I would like to pitch my own show to A&E: Thermostat Wars.  MFD cranks the heat up and turns our house into a floppy sweatbox so he can meander around in shorts, flip flops and a t-shirt all winter. Meanwhile I'm so hot I'm panting and woozy and my skin is so dry it's about to crack. But he questions my need for humidifiers on every floor.  We conduct our Thermostat Wars like sniper ninjas. We don't discuss the heat. I hear "beep beep beep" from wherever I am and I know he's turned it up, so I wait a few seconds before slinking over and turning it down, "beep beep beep beep." A&E, this is a goldmine. I'll be awaiting your call.

And finally, the zit on my face looks like a flesh wound. Am I 14 or 34?

Searching around for some Clearasil,


  1. Stephanie you were born on a Tuesday- you must love tuesdays from now on and the universe will keep rewarding you with beautiful Tuesdays
    Love the blog - love you
    Love is all you need!
    Love from your loving Mother.

  2. You have to add Seven-Up cake to your menu! It is fabulous!

  3. My family has fish on Christmas know, the Italian thing. An easy fan fave is always Calamari!

  4. This renovation is also messing with my mind. Can't wait to see the finished product. L

  5. Two things: 1.) jalapeno popper dip will be a religious experience for you if you haven't tried it yet. I've made it many a time and it's always well-received.
    2.) Like MFD, Mr. B is a modern day Heat Miser. My beloved home has become the Sahara. My three day-old Christmas tree is already about to spontaneously combust and it hurts to blink.

  6. This Blog makes up for last nights dismaly attended Relay event... Keep cracking these Gems out hun! I love you and your weinerwhistle blog... BTW, I invited Betty the midget over for Christmas... She will don an elf costume!...MFD!


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