Slithering towards Christmas Break

via GIPHY

Slither (v): to slide or slip unsteadily on a loose or slippery surface.

What has 2018 been to me and a lot of you but a loose or slippery surface? No year is all good or bad, but let's just say I prefer my years to shift under my feet much less than this one did. I don't like to scramble for a new hold every second. 

I am in the every day is a good day to start fresh camp but I must acknowledge that I'm looking forward to the symbolism of the year change more than usual. When I am in a period of personal reassessment and change, I find I have less desire to engage in my traditions, which means some of them are destined for change too. 

I didn't send cards for the first time in 15 years and where I thought I'd feel regret, I felt relief. I didn't put all of my interior Christmas stuff out and I don't hate the minimalist approach to seasonal decor. My living room and basement are in a state of transition and even though I'm entertaining this weekend, I don't care. I don't think I have the right amount of gifts and what I have is not sorted or wrapped but I am operating under the you get what you get and you don't get upset guide to gift giving.

Despite not doing those things - or because of the space created by not holding resentment about doing them when I don’t feel like it - I feel like I have more capacity to enjoy what matters most to me at Christmas: face time with friends and family;  reading with the tree as a backdrop; and time off to just be, or in my case to get shit done or rest, I get tired really quickly and still am not back to normal. My company was awesome and gave us Christmas Eve and NYE as additional holidays and I am here for it.

Will I go back to those things next year? Maybe. Those are decisions for next year. I won't hold so tightly to the old that I have no room for anything new. The nice thing about traditions is that they’re always there if you feel like going back to them. They don’t hold it against you if you skip a year or five.

TWTW - the one with the first birthday

Friday was my work Christmas party, which was fun as always and we made it to the train with about 10 seconds to spare so we didn't have to wait until midnight for the next one, praise the lort. There was an HVAC issue outside of the room that pissed me off as the party organizer but other than that smooth sailing. 

Saturday I took it easy all day - I was only back to work on Thursday and a long day Friday did me in. My energy is not back to where it was pre-walking pneumonia, not even close. I read a book and watched Game of Thrones all day - FINE I WATCH GAME OF THRONES NOW. MFD made monkey bread. We both made separate batches of chili and talked a bunch of shit to each other about which one was better. 

Sunday I did some food prep, moved some stuff around in the basement, took pics of shit to sell on ebay, changed and washed sheets, did a load of towels, and we went to my nephew's first birthday. Aubrey did an awesome job with the theme from the invites as she always does, with real wood centerpieces and a trail mix bar but I didn't get a lot of pics because my phone was playing the music. The birthday boy is the sweetest, happiest, cutest kid (no social media for my niece and nephew but trust me on that) and today is his actual birthday. Happy birthday Baby Steeeeeeve. I love you so much! 

Weekly food prep: scrambled eggs for breakfast, blackberries for snack, tuna salad for lunch with crackers if necessary, dinners are leftover chili and mac and cheese from the party, and I'll make something involving chicken thighs at some point. 

And you? 

An Incomplete List of Books I'd Buy for People

I'm not good at blanket recommendations of books - I'm more likely to ask well what do you like to read and how quickly do you read and how important is it for everything you read to make you feel some type of way. I'm throwing caution to the wind here and sharing some books I'd buy for people if I was looking for a gift book. I meant for this to be a pretty extensive categorically refined list but look, it's less than two weeks until Christmas and I didn't get there. If you are looking for a recommendation for the type of reader you don't see listed below, comment or email me. Like kid books. I have no kids but I buy a lot of kid books for the kids in my life. I didn't corral those titles here.

Most kindle and paperbacks I've shared are within a few dollars of each other price-wise. For gifts, I like to give actual books unless I'm giving a subscription or gift card. These are all linked to Amazon and are affiliate links - the pennies I make if you purchase through these links cost you nothing and pay for Show Us Your Books. If you hate Amazon most of these can be found at your local bookstore.

I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika L. Sanchez
For an in-tune teen.
Buy the hardcover/kindle

Sworn to Silence: A Kate Burkholder Novel by Linda Castillo
For someone looking to start a series
Buy the paperback/kindle

Becoming by Michelle Obama
For people who like strong, smart women
Buy the hardcover/kindle

Then She Was Gone by Lisa Jewell
For someone who likes a smart mystery
Buy the paperback/kindle 

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones
For someone who likes an emotional, layered read
Buy kindle / hardback.

Shotgun Lovesongs by Nickolas Butler
For someone who likes a little angst and 80s movie type-glancing over the cold, empty Midwestern landscape
Buy paperback/kindle

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo
For the woman who likes chick lit with a few knives buried inside
Buy paperback/kindle

Wild Embers by Nikita Gill 
For the woman that lets you see glimpses of wild and fire in her soul and likes poetry
Buy the paperback/kindle

White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin DiAngelo
For your damn self, especially if you're white. Nothing says holiday like a book about racism! Ho Ho HO. This is a book written by a white person specifically for white people who are progressive and think they are beyond racism. Buy it over library it so you can highlight and write in the margins. My copy is highlighted to high heaven. It was a good way to look at myself and my attitudes. Give yourself the gift of reflection and the world the gift of less white fragility and the ability to talk about race. It's not bad to talk about like we've always been taught. p.s. saying "I'm colorblind" is not as good as we were taught it was, either
Buy the paperback/kindle


Other Book-y things

Kindle Unlimited/Audible
Not sure of someone's taste but know they read on an e-reader? Get them a six month Kindle Unlimited membership. If you or a loved one drive a lot, consider signing up for a free 30 day trial of Audible and listen to some books in the car. Even though I am not a good listener, I am in the car alone too much back and forth to the shore and might do this next spring.

Book of the Month Club
Send someone a month and see if they like it. If they do, they can continue it on their own.

E-reader
If you are looking for an e-reader, I recommend the Kindle Paperwhite 100%. I spend a lot of time reading outside and you can do that with this and still see even when you're wearing polarized sunglasses. It's on sale for $99 until 12/23. Prior to this I had two hand me down Amazon Fires from my aunt Lori and they were great but I couldn't read them in the sun.

Book Light
This one is rechargeable and priced well at $12. I use it when I read on the little porch at the shore in the summer.

Happy Friday!

Thursday Thoughts - And there is always one last light to turn out and one last bell to ring

1. I finally left the house at lunch yesterday - I've been inside since I got home from work on Friday - and forgot to put shoes on. MFD was like it's fine, it's Aldi. Win some, lose some. Not leaving the house all weekend, working from home for the first few days of this week, and doing no hausfrauing means I have spent more consecutive time in my living room than I ever have before. I want to skip over Christmas and move on to the rearranging of the room. If I was well last weekend, it would surely be painted right now.

2. About the only productive thing I've done all week is change out the shower curtain. The last time I switched it was also in December, two years ago. It must be an end of the year thing in this house.

3. Bender loves this freaking turtle. No other dog has touched it all year. It's noisy and he likes to paw it until it makes the noise. He brought this with him to his resting spots, it wasn't placed with him.

4. Back in the office today so no more dog photos during the day this week. I'm happy, I am tired and bored of myself. Bruce and Bender adore each other and I'm so glad. Gus and Mae look to be out of the way of the always moving puppy play zone at all times.

5. Nails insider tip: I paint them as they'll be painted - AKA outside the lines - then when they dry I clean them off under water. But today you get the not cleaned off, janky over-painted nail pic. OPI Go With the Lava Flow and This Color's Making Waves.

6. Democrats, stop taking corporate money that makes you loyal to corporations over your constituents. You don't get to say you're for the people and vote like you're not. Not anymore. Stop campaigning on things you have no intention of delivering on or you're out. Everyone sign the petition, fuck who you got money from. And while you'ree in office, put bills to vote that take money out of politics. Corporate democrats, you're next on the chopping block.

7. This is not justice. Add in the Baylor rapist released with a $400 fine this week too. Please make a simple phone call on Cyntoia Brown's behalf. How can you see this type of thing and think there is racial and gender equality?

8. Famous people Instagram accounts I enjoy: Luvvie Ajayi, Sally Kohn, Jennifer Garner, Will Smith, Jason Biggs (#jadonsladies), Sophia Bush, and Comments by Celebs.

9.  Reminder:

10. E-card of the week: Right? Everything is simultaneously speeding up and slowing down.

What appears after the hyphen in Thursday Thoughts is a song lyric to whatever I'm listening to when I start to write the post. This week is Mrs. Potter's Lullaby by Counting Crows.

Show Us Your Books - December 2018

Ho ho ho, here's the December issue of Show Us Your Books. Don't forget the Favorites of 2018 Special SUYB on Wednesday, 12/26 - that will remain up for seven days as usual so you have time there. This is the first linkup with a relaunched Inlinkz, so that's what's up if it looks different to you than normal. I think you have to re-sign up and verify yourselves. 

Happy happy birthday to my Mimi today!

Here's what I've been reading since the last linkup. The title link goes to Goodreads and the buy link goes to Amazon and is an affiliate link - pennies that are made from you buying through it pay for the running of this link up.

Engrossing Reads

Night of Miracles (Arthur Truluv #2) by Elizabeth Berg - If you missed the Truluv people, this is for you. Not as good as the first one but that's to be expected. I'd live in this town with these people. A good dip out from the real world. Free e-copy from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Buy kindle or hardback 

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones - I put off reading this for a long time because one of my claustrophobia panic inducing nightmares is innocent people being incarcerated. This book was so, so good and emotional and heartbreaking and so many things. Hardback, own. Buy kindle or hardback. 

Moloka'i by Alan Brennert - I've had this for a while and finally got around to it over Thanksgiving weekend. It took a while to get through but it was quite good. Colonialism and leprosy made real with great characters. Paperback, own. Buy kindle or hardback or paperback. 

I Know You Know by Gilly Macmillan - I couldn't put this one down. After finishing, I had some issues with it, but that's not really what I concern myself with in regards to reading - I go more with how I felt while I was reading it. Not wanting to put it down goes a long way. Philly library hardback. Buy kindle or hardback or paperback 

White Fragility: Why It's So Hard for White People to Talk About Racism by Robin DiAngelo - White people, read this. Even/especially if you are progressive and think you are past racism. Written by a white person for white people. Racism is in everything, everywhere, and we've been conditioned to live with it and never think about it because white supremacy dictates that WHITE is the standard we base everything off of. No, you can't be color blind or treat everyone as individuals and skate by. This makes you think, even if you think you're woke. You can't change it if you aren't seeing it. Buy it for yourself for Christmas and change it. I wish this was required reading. Paperback, own, with a ton of highlighting and writing in the margins. Buy kindle or paperback - the paperback is $11 and worth it. Please consider it

Between the Lies by Michelle Adams - I figured out what was happening about 1/2 way through but it didn't lessen my enjoyment. That rarely does - I don't read books with elements of mystery/suspense to figure shit out and get disappointed/not if I do/don't. I read to watch the story unfold. I liked this book, good pace! Free copy from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Book comes out in March 2019. 

Passed the Time Just Fine

Believe Me by J.P. Delaney - This was what's up is down/what's down is up and I didn't know what was real for some of this. Very tightly woven and interesting but also a little what? OCNJ library hardback. 

Holy Ghost (Virgil Flowers #11) by John Sanford - That fuckin' Flowers is back in this novel. Not one of my favorites of the series, but totally serviceable. You win some, you lose some in a long series. Philly library hardback

Salvage the Bones by Jesmyn Ward - Woosah. This book. Like the first one, the writing is excellent. Visceral. The dog fighting, I can't though. If you can't either, don't. Paperback, own. 

What the Dead Know by Laura Lippman - Eh. I've liked better by her, but some of it was good. If I was sitting on a bus and had nothing else to read, I'd be happy with this. This is straddling the line of passed the time just fine and not worth it. Used paperback, own. 

Montauk by Nicola Harrison - Predictable from jump, along the Beatriz Williams line of summer releases. If you like those, you'll like this. Free ARC from Netgalley, comes out June 2019

Her One Mistake by Heidi Perks - This book stressed me out in a good way. I read it in a few hours so the pace was good too. Free ARC from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Book comes out in early January 2019.

Not Worth It
Forget You Know Me by Jessica Strawser - I loved the last book I read by her. This one just, no. I didn't like any character, which does not keep me from liking a book if the story is good. The premise of this book and the resulting story are not the same thing. That doesn't usually deter me from liking a book either, but it all stacked up against this one. Free ARC from Netgalley in exchange for an honest review. Book comes out February 2019

Did Not Finish

n/a

What have you been reading? 

Linkup Guidelines:

This link up is the second Tuesday of every month. The next linkup is the annual Favorite Reads linkup will be on WEDNESDAY, 12/26 and the first SUYB of 2019 is January 8, 2019 

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