Thursday, November 17, 2016

Thursday Thoughts : love is not a victory march, it's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

1. What I'm doing post-election: Retreating into myself and being generally uncommunicative even with those who are of the same mind as me. I think people expected more talk from me, but I need to regroup. I'm not articulating well right now so I have to stop trying to...and frankly I think the time for talk is over - after all, if people did not care about the divisive rhetoric of the trump campaign before, they're not going to care now that he's been elected. I'm figuring out the actions I want to take going forward: exploring local options for activism; attending the Women's March on D.C. in January; supporting actual journalism and news sources like the New York Times and the Washington Post and NPR; calling my government representatives to urge them to speak out against the appointment of a white supremacist as chief advisor to the president elect; reading articles like this and about intersectional feminism; donating to the Southern Poverty Law Center monthly, buying Christmas gifts for LGBTQ youth through the Valley Youth House wish list as well as Planned Parenthood where I've been donating quarterly for as long as I've been able to afford to; and seeing the silver lining - the wake up call to all of us, even those of us who thought we were involved enough, like myself. I wasn't. I'm appreciative of my civil friends who voted differently than I did but who respect my space and beliefs. You do not have to have the same voting record as me to have room at my table but you have to recognize and be willing to stand up to the marginalization of others and you above all else have to not talk to me like I'm a fucking idiot. But mostly this week I've been sustaining myself on Biden memes.

2. What I'm not doing post-election: Normalizing any of this. Pretending not to see the acts of hate I personally witnessed in a liberal city last week. Allowing people to shit on peaceful protests and the right to assemble. Listening to people who say I'm over-reacting. Explaining myself to people who act like I owe them that for things I'm choosing to do in response to this election. Tolerating people who want me to respect their beliefs but have zero respect for mine - those people have no room at my table regardless of who they are. Playing nice so things are more comfortable and less awkward - that has gotten me nowhere - and we are well beyond politics and into human rights and equality at this point in the game. Ignoring the fact that trump's entire team is full of Washington insiders even though so many voted for him because he's an "outsider" who promised to "drain the swamps." Downplaying or hiding my anger - I am angry as hell and dare anyone to tell me I don't have the right to be. Accepting and going back to life as I know it. Just because I'm quieter in general doesn't mean I'm silent - I'm just using my voice where it's needed most right now, and that's not in trying to change the minds of people who don't see the crisis or in preaching to the choir.

3. What I'm eating: wonton soup. It's the cure for what ails me and a lot of things ail me right now, including this lingering illness that will not die. I've slept over nine hours every night, taken holistic and non-holistic measures to rid myself of it,  and I'm still not over it.

4. What I'm reading: Inching along with The Trespasser. I haven't had a good chunk of time to devote to this, and with all the books in the Dublin Murder series, I need a little time to acclimate to the language and the setting.

5. What I'm watching: The Fall. I finished season three this week. Anyone else?

6. What I'm struggling with on the petty side: chipped nails; magically disappearing hat that I got for my mom for helping with the dogs; two time changes (Ireland changes time before we do) + jet lag = apocalypse now

7. What I'm looking forward to: this season of SNL (haven't said that in a hot minute), drinking 479 cups of Barry's tea this winter, Thanksgiving food, getting back to the shore and existing in a quiet town for 24 hours.

8. What I'm loving: my new quilt made with love by Lori. It's reminiscent of a much beloved quilt my Mom-Mom made me. It makes me happy to see it and sleep under it.
9. Reminding you, me, and all of us since the weekend is coming: 
10.  E-card of the week: 
Happy happy birthday to Denise today, my framily member since she was born. 

Linking up with Kristin

Stuff, Things, etc.


  1. Well, spoken, as always Steph.

    I, too, have retreated to a quiet, internal place. I simply needed a time out, some time to process, and time to mourn. This is the first time in my adult life that I actually feel afraid about the future.

    PS Although I've been limiting my time online, I've been enjoying the Biden memes, too.

  2. The Obama/Biden/Trump memes always get me.

  3. Amen to all of this. I love whoever is making all the memes. I need to find some quality won ton soup. Hugs.

  4. The Biden memes slay me. EVERY single time. I wish we could send them to him and Barack. They'd surely laugh! I just know it. Go Lori, with that quilt! So (as you said) reminiscent of childhood ones that so many of us had. My mom-mom made us all one too - (they were all different patterns for each of us) and I wish I still had it. I also wish I knew how to do that! Lori sure has a nice talent/hobby there.

  5. I can't deal with political talk right now, so I hear you. It's so much negativity from both sides and none of it is productive. You can be mad, and there's so many ways to take action, but beating up other human beings is not one of them. (Unless they hurt an animal, then kill them who cares.) The Biden memes are glorious though, my favorite is the toupee as a horcrux one.
    Anyway, Ireland changes time before us?! That's brutal, you must be feeling awful. What's Barry's tea?

  6. I love your list of what you're doing now. I think it's easy to get overwhelmed and not know where to start. Donating time and money and not being silenced is so important now. And when that gets overwhelming we have Joe Biden to make it all a little better :) I totally had Chinese food for lunch yesterday as well. Not my healthiest lunch this week but I needed something that made me feel better. And sesame chicken always does the trick.

  7. Well said on the election, Steph. I couldn't have put it into words better myself. I can't stand the people who say "get over it" and "move on" but then post things to incite more anger/upset. I'm still scared for what's to come and who he has "guiding" him.
    But in the meantime, the Biden memes give me life :)
    Hope you start to feel better soon friend!

  8. The Biden memes are lifting my spirits immensely. I haven't found one that isn't ridiculously hilarious. Oh how I'll miss the Obamas and Uncle Joe. I love the quote about not accepting things. I've never seen that but I love it.

  9. Ooooh I hadn't seen the Twilight meme. Good one.

    Dave Chappelle on SNL was fantastic. I'm glad you said you're still having a hard time, post-election. I feel similarly. I don't think being tired of the election is going to help anything, but I get it - so many messages all at once. But now isn't the time to be tired, it's the time to at least be informed so we can know what we want to change and how to do it rather than just thinking the impossible isn't going to happen. Because it did.

  10. Brava. We need to give our minds a rest. I need peace and I am trying to give it to myself and the way I lead my life. I do not like confrontation or commotion. I will do whatever to avoid it and the result is people get way upset when I voice my hurts or opinions. Chipped nail polish make me use frosted pale colors. Happiest birthday to our Denise. I remember vividly the day I met her. Such a gift. Happy and peaceful Thursday to all. Love. Your. Momma.

  11. What a beautiful quilt!!!!

    The beginning of SNL choked me up last week. Cant wait for Kristin Wig this week!!!

    Yes! Everyone deserves to feel the way they want about the election - every 4 years, half the population is upset. It's just what happens. I love you are putting your actions with your words & doing proactive things. Good for you!

    Those Biden meme's had me cracking up yesterday - I ran into a load of them. Laughing is great medicine.

  12. I love the Biden memes. I ordered a "A Woman's Place is in the House and the Senate" tank and donated to Emily's List, which made me temporarily feel better about things.

    Hope you feel better soon!

  13. "What I'm not doing post-election: Normalizing any of this." - YES! That is my biggest fear. That the people who are riled up now - won't be in a week, a month, a year. And in that time, I can't even write his name, will have free reign to do what he wants. And his agenda is not good. Love the actions you are taking and that's what I need to do as well. Because I am feeling helpless, but I'm not. I just need to figure out a plan and start doing.

  14. This season of SNL is absolutely KILLING IT and Dave Chappelle...well, he was spectacular.

    I am struggling with my voice right now. I'm trying to use it to express my anger and frustration and my activism is slowly ramping up (I am monumentally disappointed that I cannot attend the march) even if I can't figure out where to channel it but I feel like it's just not enough. While I know that many small voices and actions add up to loud ones, I can't shake the feeling that I should be doing more.

    Also, The Fall. OMG. That ending.

  15. Good for you for doing what you can now, but also taking care of yourself. You don't have to be the loudest in the room. Do what you can. I'm horrified by everything that is happening now that Trump has been elected- decisions he's making, the hate that's taking over the country and stories people are sharing of hatred turned towards them. I wish I could say I was surprised, but I'm not. It's just awful.


  16. I'm in the same boat- I'm not saying much, because those who need to hear it obviously aren't listening. I'm not giving up, but I truly feel like these next four years are going to be a fucking battle...gotta rest up and prepare for the fight while I can.

  17. Chris and I have been watching SNL every week for the first time in a really long time. I especially loved seeing Dave Chappelle! Wonton soup is a favorite of mine. I have been feeling all sniffly and stuff this week, perhaps that is just what I need too! Should I be watching The Fall?

  18. Give me ALL the Obama/Biden memes. All of them!

    Also, too funny, I was drafting a post last night and finally got it up today and there's a similar sentiment in ours as it relates to channeling this anger into something GOOD and productive. I keep wanting to do more, more, more -- it's all that's getting me through right now.

    And yes, that doesn't mean life is all rainbows & butterflies and I've moved on from this. It's all about the Resistance and continuing to FIGHT.

  19. The Fall... just finished the last episode last night! I'm sad it's over and would really love to see more of those characters. Half the things that happened in that last episode I just really didn't see coming. So. GOOD.

    1. I would also love to see more of those characters. The last episode was bananas.

  20. Standing and clapping for 1 and 2, though I had a lot to say in my post today because I just needed to expel it. I feel like some things have been churning over and over in my mind and they would just stay there, keeping me awake at night and distracted during the day, until I gave them a new home. By the way, thanks for telling me about the buses to DC for the march; I hadn't realized before we spoke that it was being organized county by county. I'll see you down there.

    I just saw a Time poll that said nearly half of Americans are motivated now that weren't previously. Between that and all the good BROTUS memes, I'd say my mood is slightly better than it was this time last week.

  21. I, personally, was disappointed in The Fall.
    I tried the first Dublin Murder Squad book last week and just couldn't get into it. I think it's me though, so I may attempt it again.
    The won-ton soup looks good.

  22. oh my goodness, those memes. i hadn't actually seen them. the bringing his own pence made me laugh way harder than it should have. i am trying to look at the silver lining, the wake up call, as well, and i KNOW i wasn't active or involved enough so that's my goal now. i do donate to planned parenthood monthly though (not a lot, but still) and have done since i moved here because they were the only place i could go. i also typed planet parenthood instead of planned and it made me laugh. 'we are well beyond politics and into human rights and equality' - yes.
    that quilt is gorgeous! i haven't watched the fall but KC basically growled at me when i tried to talk to him while he was watching it the other day. rude.

  23. I, too, am surviving on those memes. I hadn't seen the twilight one yet haha. I hope this weekend brings you lots of rest and you're able to finally kick this sickness.

  24. Wow, this is my first time coming across your blog via bloglovin' and I must say that you captured everything I am feeling right concerning this election. Your what I'm not doing point is everything I'm not doing either! One of the things that concerns me regarding all of this is the possibility of the normalization of it. I fear that liberals will get tired of speaking out because they don't want to be looked at as sore losers, or because they don't want to be ostracized, or because they want to make everyone one comfortable by not addressing it, but by not speaking out we breed an environment where some believe that it is okay to continue to spew and act on the hate that the president elect has encouraged. I thought that I would be relived once this vicious election cycle was over, but in all honesty I am more concerned for the USA especially after seeing some of his cabinet picks :-(


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