I'm going through a phase.

It's here. It's the unwelcome guest that darkens my doorstep every summer: the fuck it phase (FIP). Fuck the housework, the laundry, the schedules, the exercise, the healthy eating, the matching clothes, the organizing, the food prep, the responsibilities, the blog schedule...fuck it all. Let the go with the flow laziness reign free.

The FIP is punctuated by weekends away, languid conversations next to large bodies of water, clothing that's almost beyond casual, sweating bottles of beer, careening through the dark night in the Pinelands and the Vinelands with the windows down and the music loud, casually discarded flip flops, sunglasses at night, and lightening bugs. It feels a little lazy, a little reckless, a little not quite on the level.

For these few weeks of the FIP, I am adrift at sea without a planner. I say yes without thinking. I go away for the weekend without making a plan or a packing list. I go three days without eating veggies. I skip the third weight workout of the week. I take naps. I leave my phone in hotel rooms and don't go back to get it. I stay out late on a Sunday night drinking beers and listening to live music, still in my bathing suit when we finally arrive home at 2:45 in the morning. I forget to download pics from my camera. I don't fully unpack from my trips. I don't edit myself when I over-write. I don't know what time it is. I let shit pile up in the basement room and don't put it where it belongs. I don't meal plan. I throw my hands in the air and wave 'em like I just don't care. I  lay it all down and leave it there, shaking off the shackles of a responsible life.

Basically, I engage in or allow all manner of things I hate. It's like I have a doppelganger who runs on opposite juice. I'm arguably a lot less uptight and Type A these few weeks than I am normally, which I'm sure people around me like. I fight to keep summer and its ways out, but once it seeps in I try to embrace it. Summer is fleeting, after all. I can't take it for long, but it is a little fun while it lasts. I'll snap out of this soon, but not this week...because, fuck it. So when you see a TWTW post about last weekend this Friday before another weekend is about to begin, just act cool and go with it. Like you saw a rare and magical unicorn or something, because you basically did.

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Haikuesday

The haiku: not safe.

I'm like fuck it, don't wanna.

Yawning as we speak. 

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Thursday Thoughts

1. I don't really have any because I've hit the vacation wall. Early. I still have two weeks to go. The pre-vacation malaise has come too soon. Everything seems to be a struggle, like additional effort is required while zero fucks are given. My motivation needs its picture on a milk carton.

2. Basically, this is all I want to do. If you're looking for some books to read, you need to check out the 35 bloggers who linked up with me & Jana for Show Us Your Books on Tuesday. That shit is on fire! My favorite blogging day of the month by far.

3. Other signs vacation is imminent: I'm about to cut a bitch every day during my commute. Yesterday, a group of us were running from the shuttle bus to the train in the morning. My favorite conductor was on and everyone knows he will not leave a group of 20 people. This lady behind me is going "Come on, move around her! That's it! She has a cane you can go faster" in a little sing-songy voice. I stopped dead and gave her a scathing look like I was setting her on fire with my eyes. She looked like she saw an ogre. And she did. We will respect the lady with the cane and we will STFU about it

4. I've been in a panic over how I'd make iced coffee on vacation since I'm not taking all of my bulk supplies.  Anyway I'm going to give this a go. The coffee is already in pods so there's no complicated straining system.

5. My summer slump is beginning. I feel less energized, more sluggish and lazier in the summer than I do at any other time of year. It's like reverse seasonal affective disorder. I get pissed off at myself when I'm blah. Later in the summer, I will be the Summer Grinch. Relax, enjoy. Stay tuned.

6. Remember how I was really excited to pay off my car in mid-May? MFD has already sold it to buy a better and larger second vehicle for his business. You were a good car, Kelly Taylor. I have re-named the car I drive now: she shall be known as Brenda Walsh.

MFD's new ride

7. My dogs kill me on weekday mornings. They're a riot. When I get out of bed, they sort of shift around and slump wherever they can. Like Mae here on the left, giving up on life and slumping onto Geege. Like they have worked so hard or done so much or something.

8. So I ordered pink chambray Tretorns from Nordstrom for myself. Hello, 1987. It's been a long time. I can't wait until you arrive.

9. I'm pretty sure I'm going to buy this at some point.

10. Ecard of the week. This had me dying laughing:

End scene. 

SMD