Friday Files 1.13.2023

Second-hand decor updates. I like to move things around after Christmas is gone and add something new when needed. These second hand finds fit the bill and I'm thrilled that they're second hand. Mosaic glass forever. The mosaic glass lamp was my mother-in-law's, she loved it too.

Happy happy birthday to my sister-in-law Aubrey. I'm lucky to have one that I love as a person and love spending time with. We have fun!

How it started

How it ended. Always go.

Some small treasures from a walk this week.

Ben is Rose from Titanic: draw me like one of your French girls. Bruce is a trance chewer/kneader. The electric blanket brings all the animals to the yard

I had a cold this week, the first time I've been sick since 2019. I sneezed a lot, which I have never done with a cold in my life. I keep thinking of the Vicks Nyquil commercial the nighttime sniffling sneezing coughing aching stuffy head fever so you can rest medicine and how I always thought who sneezes when sick and MFD and I talked about how we never did and now we know and we do. MFD had the sneezes too. This is not the same immune system as pre-covid era. It isn't any fun. I've also spent the week looking - I can say this objectively - absolutely terrible. 10/10 do not recommend this cold season

I'm cooking straight out of the freezer and pantry right now, and the meals start out so nicely then deteriorate into like a freezer burned roll smeared with Worcestershire sauce or something. Not quite so bad but I do hate food waste so I need to burn through some stuff. 

Sometimes you make good nail combos and take clear pictures and sometimes you don't. 

Keenan Anderson. I'm not repeating shit said ad infinitum but that is not public safety and we are not killing people in the streets and calling it public safety. Black Lives Matter.

Just started. I know people are out there defending the Windsors like they are blood relations and raging against Harry and Meghan. I've got no skin in this game or big opinions, I just wanted to read it. 

I started painting our shore apartment this week - the space is so small with limited places to move things that I'm doing it piecemeal. Tuesday I did the shortest wall and trim around the window. If you know me you know I am not a neutrals person so the blah beige was really on my nerves over the past year. This is SW6736 jocular green. 

Hope you have a fabulous weekend, especially those of you with a three dayer for MLK on Monday. That is not me and has never been me.

Also say a prayer or light a flare that MFD finds a replacement for his totaled car in the next two days before I riot in the streets. We've been sharing a car since 12/16. You know I'm not a good sharer.

Getting hygge with it

About 87% certain I have used this blog post title at some point in recent Januarys. I know a lot of people consider this a dark and aimless month, but I quite enjoy it. We will not discuss February at this time, during which I usually feel knocking down the walls and busting at the seams. I have a plan for that this year, so fingers crossed. 

Back to January. I talked earlier this week about tracking habits, and I feel like I have ample time in this long month to get my habits in line with my intentions. I also have ample time to stuff myself with books and TV. For me wellness is about feeling good mentally and physically, but it's also about reading and watching and feeling comfortable and relaxed in my skin and in my home. Some points of home comfort and wellness for me: 

Pantry 

I cook a lot in January, which requires a well stocked pantry and no expired shit. Carol helped me purge in Philly and I did the same at the shore, now I'm cooking through what's left. I hate wasted food

Take care of business

Reducing discomfort and annoyance is top in all living scenarios. Earlier this week I was taping up windows in this 122 year old four story house. I also paid my main peeps, my exterminators, I do service every quarter with them which is an absolute must in a rental. A pest control service provider will ensure your home is nuisance-free, and the right one is a godsend. My favorite tech Walter and I cried through 2020 in masks together. No lie. LOL. 

Soft furnishings

Soft furnishings are king. Rugs, blankets, and pillows are all easy ways to add warmth to your home while enhancing your comfort. I always take stock of mine in January and replace what needs it. Clean blankets are always welcome at most animal shelters, and you can also hand them out to any houseless people in the area who might be in need. My personal favorite sheets are the 400 thread count printed performance sheet set from Threshold at Target. Printed only, I hate the feel of the solid. You all can keep your 800,1000 thread count crap. I hate microfiber (used to use) and cannot with anything that is not 100% cotton. I have clear lines drawn around sheets.

Address clutter spots

I like to mow through spaces as I come upon them, and I am always lurking around my own house in January plus I'm integrating holiday stuff so it's a good time to address clutter as you come upon it.

Add things that make you happy

Another great way of making your home more comfortable is by adding things that make you happy. I like to update my decor a lot, and I end up moving things around to make it seem new. I do add new pieces from time to time. The past six months, that has been taper candleholders which are absolutely perfect to have out and around in January since it's dark for a long period at night and also has its fair share of gray days. 

If you have ever seen photos of my living areas, you know color, fresh flowers, art, books, and shiny things make me happy too. If we don't feel happy in our homes, where the hell will we feel happy? 

What about you? What are you doing this month to be happier within your four walls?

TWTW - the halloweekend

Friday was a shit weather day with winds, rain, and flooding. But it was also a tie dye leggings day and we love those. I extended my lunch to hit the ReStore where the stools I wanted had already been snapped up, but I did score a fall wreath at the HomeGoods next door as well as Christmas pug towels which I always seem to miss. I also picked up pumpkins from the garden center on the way back into town. Ben was super clingy because of the winds outside. After work I got two electric fireplaces down from under a bed on the top floor, depositing on two flights down in the living room and one three flights down in our apartment. There's a whole shift that happens at the shore as we approach the winter. I cleaned two bathrooms, moved some excess living room furniture up into a bedroom, and started rearranging shit in our apartment. Salad for dinner while watching Witches of Eastwick. I watched a bunch of Bewitched episodes too and stayed up late to finish a book.

Saturday I slept in until 8:15 and it was glorious. I packed up stuff to head to Philly for the week, refilled my vitamins like a woman of a certain age, changed sheets, vacuumed and mopped my apartment, vacuumed the main floor upstairs, cleaned the powder room, cleared out both fridges, took the trash out, and packed up the car. We took a long walk on the beach then drove back to Philly. I did a few loads of laundry, unpacked stuff, went through mail and packages, started a new book, and the three musketeers (MFD, my Dad, and Carol) watched the freaking Shining. I shared popcorn with my animal kingdom (even Billy cat) and went to bed.

Sunday Dad got bagels from Red House, I cut down the hydrangea and weeded, then went through my closet and purged a bag of stuff. Carol and dad made mini burgers for lunch and I deconstructed mine, my niece and nephew stopped by in costume, Carol made mozz sticks, then it was trick or treat time. MFD came down in an unplanned costume and did his live pumpkin carving as is tradition and futzed with outdoor decor until nearly 7. I was back inside by 7:45 and in bed by 9:30.

Happy All Saints' Day! 

I’m in the office today, and off tomorrow. The first thing I’ll do is vote, of course. What’s your voting plan?

Make yourself a welcoming outdoor space

It's easy to make cheap changes to your outdoor space. We have a small patio in Philly and a super small shore porch. Making both spaces welcoming for us and guests was easy, with no need for big renovation projects either. With a few little additions (and some subtractions when applicable), you can  transform your small yard or patio into a haven of warmth and tranquility. 

Let there be light - string lights and lanterns

If you want to create an instant magical feel then decorate the space with solar-powered string lights or solar lantern. They charge using the sun’s energy during the day and automatically come on as it starts to get dark which feels like magic even when I know the why behind it. String lights are perfect for outdoor spaces and give off a warm, flattering light. I have the solar string lights and lanterns in Philly and two lanterns on our tiny porch at the shore. 

Eat outside

Get yourself a little table and make it a point to eat outside on nice days. I like to do this the easy way with cheese and crackers and a little relish tray, which has a selection of delicious pickled treats. Add a bowl of nuts and maybe some strawberries and you'll be gold. I

Add warmth in the evenings

When the evenings begin to get cooler again, I always want to be able to stay outside for as long as possible. I have porch blankets now - do we all have porch blankets now? Throw them in a suncast outdoor box and call it a day. If you want to spend a little, you can invest in outdoor heating - we had a little table top jobber that used the small propane tanks in Philly but we don't have one anymore. Last year there was a huge run on outdoor heaters and with the way the delta is going, there may be another. If you don't like the propane component you could always opt for a small, portable fire pit. They are usually not too pricey either and add to the atmosphere.

DIY your own bar cart

I like the convenience of being able to roll all of my crap in and out at once without having to carry things. You can buy my favorite IKEA cart, be more sustainable and upcycle a second-hand cart, or if you're handy you could upcycle a second-hand cart or use recycled wood or a pallet to build your own. Check out these DIY bar cart ideas for inspiration. You can wheel the cart in to serve yourself food and drinks and to keep your candles, books, whatever on. 

Declutter the space

It’s not necessary to entirely renovate your home before you yourself can enjoy it or you feel comfortable having guests come over, but a little wipe up here and there and some minor decluttering goes a long way instead. Through the course of daily life things tend to pile up around us as we get lazy here and there and don't put things away, or bring something new into spaces without properly clearing out old. It happens to the best of us. Before jujing up your outdoor space, get rid of any old or unused items. Do a spot of weeding. It's worth spending an afternoon on this. With a quick tidy up, you can really transform your yard into a lovely little place that serves as a respite from the world. 

Happy Saturday!

Thursday Thoughts - there's a pale moon in the sky the kind you make your wishes on

1. The Olympics and sports leagues are having a time. As FeministaFabulous said on Instagram in two separate posts, "Are the Olympics okay?" and "Alternately, we could just let women live" in regards to attire. The racism, sexism, and ableism on display in the Olympics and various sports boards or whatever in leagues wherever is straight fucking trash. Not to mention disqualifying a track woman for marijuana, which has never made anyone faster at anything or enhanced performance regarding speed in anything. Can we fucking do away with archaic "laws" that are just there to oppress people? Man alive.

2. Hard agree. Me yesterday.

3. I'm letting my toenails breathe, which I never ever do in the summer. They're always polished. It's quite liberating and also feels like something has been left undone, been overlooked, got lost in translation.

4. Through work from home life, I started working at the dining room table, then eventually I moved to a room in the basement, made MFD give me his big desk, set myself up nice, then decided I wanted to move my office to the top floor. So this is in progress. The pink cabinet was brought home from the shore a few years ago. The chair is from the basement. I'm building out a gallery wall the way I like to do it which is not measure jack shit and just assemble things I like which is eclectic and also loud. My pink desk is coming in a little over a week. The second desk we had in the basement that I made MFD take is over 10 years old and is about to collapse. 

5. Yes, that's a new dog bed for the new office too. MFD was like, "Can we stop buying new dog beds? We have so many." No. We cannot. Go on about your business and worry about your own self. 

6. I am trying to build a routine where I go into the office once every other week at least with the goal possibly being once a week by the end of the year. I need a day out of work from home life and I miss a lot about the city. There's a lot I don't miss too, but I do miss some.

7. I will never understand not getting this vaccine if you are able to get this vaccine. Imagine your children or grandchildren getting Covid because of you. Imagine them having long-haul health issues because of you that negatively impact their whole lives. Hell, not even kids related to you closely, just kids you pass by in the store because I know for shit sure people who are not vaccinated are going to stores and out in public and not wearing a mask or maintaining distance. Going mask-free and closing up the distance is for people who are vaccinated. Not people who refuse to get the vaccine. Imagine in general thinking 600,000+ dead from a virus is not a big deal. 

8. Co-sign this. In my world this time of day is good for absolutely nothing except laying around, reading, or doing other things that don't require serious brain power. 

9. Reminder: We have a tendency as humans to count small things piling on each other - or more typically a big thing piled on by smaller things. Sometimes, unfortunately, a few big things in succession that feel like knock outs. Most of us still have so much going right for us and it's good to remind myself (and you, in the process) of that. 

10. Ecards: can't hurt to give yourself a leg up.

Happy birthday to Mr. Chris yesterday!

And you?

What appears beyond the hyphen in Thursday Thoughts titles is what I'm listening to or most recently heard when I'm starting this - this week is I don't wanna fight by Tina Turner

Thursday Thoughts - I believe it's time for me to fly

Hanging shit wherever I want, as I always do. My house is not going to be in magazines and it's not for show. It's for me to live in and enjoy. I had this in one of the spare rooms for probably the past 10 years and it makes me so happy but I rarely saw it in there so I jammed it in right here in our bedroom.

Choosing art by Asja Boros for bedside in our room. I have one in the  middle of the gallery wall too.

Accepting MFD's desire for more precise hanging on the gallery wall that was painted this week. It's not done and we'll be swapping some things out, but I'm happy to not have shit sitting in piles to be hung anymore.

Focusing on putting covers on the risers next, so we intentionally did not have the trim painted. I desire a little whimsy on these and that's what I got. 

Thinking a lot of people have this twisted, and we were taught this so that we fight each other and punch down or sideways in a capitalist system instead of punching up. Hard work is great but it is not what makes you a good or bad person. Too many people beating their chest with the I work hard for what I have that are shitty neighbors and humans. No thanks. I'd rather live among people who are good neighbors and community members that understand work is the price of capitalism and not the marker of a good person and that people who don't work hard deserve at the least basic humanitarian needs fulfilled - food, housing, healthcare including mental healthcare. There is a better way than what we're doing now, what we've been doing for a long time in this country.

Using Mad Hippie face serums and loving them.

Wanting everyone to get vaccinated for reasons like this. 

Appreciating the fact that Gus can spend so much of his time in his declining years snoozing in the yard, which is one of his favorites and always has been.

Hanging on for dear life this week. I worked until 9:30 Monday night, 8:30 Tuesday night, 7:00 last night. Started early today, will make a stop to drive to the shore, and be back at it. Deadlines are afoot. Putting in these hours is a lot harder for me after March 2020. My brain, focus, and capacity have shifted. 

Phoning it in on every other front aside from work this week, including here. That's how it is sometimes. 

Booking a hotel for the first time since 2017? I think it's been that long since I stayed in a hotel type accommodation vs booking a private home or visiting someone at their home. I'm looking forward to road tripping out of town with MFD in August to visit a place neither of us has been before. 

Reading The Invisible Husband of Frick Island. I had two (to me) turds this week. If you ever want to see what I'm reading in between Show Us Your Books, you can follow me on Goodreads. Midway through the year I've finished 67 books so it appears that my pre-pandemic reading has returned. I read differently though, consuming books in a few hours here or there versus morning and night reading like I used to. I still do a little of both but still not with pre-pandemic consistency.

What's new with you?

What appears beyond the hyphen in Thursday Thoughts titles is what I'm listening to when I'm starting this - this week is Time for Me To Fly by REO Speedwagon

Thursday Thoughts - and if you want to find me I'll be out in the sandbox

Loving yard art, this is from Hearth & Sole in Ocean City and I adore them

Urging you to check out this book, Fuel Your Best, by my friend Jen - I got one for my niece and one for the shore house kids library. She's a great person and this has a great message for kids and for us!

Monitoring baby bird status out back as the mother has squatted in my begonia and killed it because she doesn't like us to water it

Congratulating all teachers, admin and school staff, kids, and parents for making it through not the easiest of school years

Repurposing election signs to hang solar lanterns from this year to complement the mini shepherd hooks

Recommending this, I get it at Marshalls usually. It's only $7 there and that is much friendlier than Living Proof's price. Living Proof is still my favorite dry shampoo, but this is entirely serviceable most days. This is my fourth bottle.

Swapping desks, bringing the bigger one into my office and moving the smaller one into the back basement room. I need room. I'm finally getting my home office as I want it just in time for my office office to officially reopen. We have no you have to be in a certain number of days thing. I'm aiming for one day a week or one every other at least. 

Hanging out with dogs

Handing dog duty over to MFD as he's been working from the shore this week both on his actual work and on becoming Tan Mom using the sun instead of tanning beds

Arguing with people on the internet again. This time on the our shore town owner’s Facebook page with people who speculated houses are being left in poor condition upon checkout because it’s people using stimulus money. Excuse me what now? 

I told them this was classism. They told me this was not classism even though they were grouping people together by income level and assigning certain behaviors to them. They were sorry I was offended. I said I’m not offended but I’m disappointed you’re blowing smoke at me acting like issues between classes don’t exist and like you are not grouping people together by income level and ascribing behaviors to that group. 

The moderator turned off comments and deleted all of the ones under the person saying she heard the renters were bad this year assuming because they used stimulus money. One person said he doesn't think these people understand the ethics of renting a vacation home. When I tell you I lost my fucking mind, I am not exaggerating. 

Imagine being like this. Just because people make less money does not mean they do not deserve material comforts, joy, or vacations. They do not need to do with their money what you think they should do with their money. We are not here to work until we die and punching down does not put you closer to billionaires.   

Reading Two library books this week. It's been a lot of advanced reader copies from Netgalley on the kindle so library books felt good. Both were recommended in the Show Us Your Books linkup (who recommended After the Fire? and definitely Laura from Alabama + Graffiti on Milk Fed), and Milk Fed was a timely read for Pride month.

Reminding us all that making Juneteenth a federal holiday actually does nothing for Black people. How about we press the government for 1) Passing the John Lewis Voting Rights Act for protection and expansion of voting rights 2) teach accurate history in schools and stop fucking wilding out over Critical Race Theory 3) Passing the goddamn Emmett Till Antilynching Act to make lynching a federal hate crime 4) Halting the destabilization of COVID relief efforts 5) reimagining public safety 6) reparations 7) Legalize cannabis 8) Decriminalize drug possession, expunge drug records, end the war on drugs  

What's new with you?

What appears beyond the hyphen in Thursday Thoughts titles is what I'm listening to when I'm starting this - this week is Brian Wilson by Barenaked Ladies

TWTW - the one in MA

Friday I worked from home before flying up to Boston to visit my BFF Kim, her husband, and my goddaughter. Steve fetched me from the airport, I got 42897 stylings of Libby photos, we had delicious takeout dinner in and lounged on couches which is my ideal Friday night. 

Saturday Kim and I hit DD and Target to kick off the day, then Steve brought home bagels and we devoured them on sight. We did some of the afternoon at a waterfront playground in Charlestown before having lunch at Pier Six. The food, wine, views, coloring book action, and company were delicious. Quiet time before hitting a four year old birthday party and we were in our pajamas on the couch with wine immediately after. I finished a book before falling asleep. Oh and at the party we split a piece of the absolute best ice cream cake I have ever had in my life from Meletharb. Thank you, parents of child I do not know.

Sunday Kim & Libby took me to the airport for my 10 am flight, where I started a new book. I was in my living room in Philly by 12:30. We went to Barnes & Noble for a book signing of The Spirit Projector by a local author/friend from high school, Kelly Deeny (you can buy her book on Book Baby, Amazon, Barnes & Noble) and saw a few other friends from high school as well. We popped into PetSmart after where I wanted to adopt a shelter cat and MFD wanted parakeets and left with nothing. Pier One up there is going out of business so we stopped in there and got a new dining room table to replace our 11 year old one. MFD went to work for a little and I cycled laundry, did some food prep, unpacked.

We went to Sakura for dinner with a Christmas gift card from my bonus grandparents Ruth & Pete. I finished out the night sussing out paint colors for the dining room here and hallway at the shore, did a salt face mask (so unsatisfying to have no mask color), and painted my nails (OPI Cajun Shrimp).

Weekly food prep: Breakfast is yogurt with granola and a side of cantaloupe. Lunches are hard boiled eggs with bell peppers, carrots, cheese, olives. Snacks are oranges. Dinner is salad salad salad and we'll start with baked chicken thighs that I'm making Monday night. I'm not sure what will be after that, possibly pasta.

Birthday month has begun.