Friday Five 11.6.2020

1. Election Day 4 in the longest year of a week ever calls for comfort food. Ramen will always be a go to of mine. Toast with a ton of butter. French bread pizzas. Spaghetti with homemade sauce. Veggie beef barley soup. I'll be picking up some more comfort food at Target today because an order I thought I placed for delivery was actually placed for pickup. No matter, I'm headed that way anyway to dump the Comcast cable boxes. We're streaming only at the shore now.

2. Mae is a constant mood. I wonder if people who are running with the voting fraud narrative know that their bullshit behind keyboards amps up people who will act on that and endangers workers counting votes as well as officials and their families. This is America. We count all the fucking votes. Regardless of who they are for. 

3. The sectional in my apartment is large. Gus and Bruce are still crowders. 

4. How can you not see you are blocking a driveway, especially when a car is in it? This happens all the time here. 

5. So filled with joy to be back. Bonus awesome weather over the weekend, which we will be out enjoying. As George Michael says, looking out for angels, just trying to find some peace. 

Happy weekend to you all! What's some of your comfort food? 

Thursday Thoughts - we're going out where the sand's turning to gold so put on your stockings, baby, 'cause the night's getting cold

Waiting for election results like the rest of us. I am extremely disappointed in people acting like democrats are trying to steal the election by counting votes. What is wrong with you? Are you unfamiliar with how democracy and voting works? You exhibit a fundamental disconnect and lack of knowledge of how elections work. All the votes get counted. And you don't incite violence and bullying mob behavior surrounding your opposition to that. You don't get to install SUPPORTERS to watch the count and intimidate people. Do you want to fucking talk about all the voter intimidation throughout my district. Do you want to talk about the man AT MY POLLING STATION waving a trump flag and yelling at Black poll workers who had to be put in the back of a cop car after police told him to stop doing that and he would not, instead aggressively waving his idiot flag at them? Where are the Back the Blue people now? I'm fucking pissed and these people supporting violence and intimidation around voting are only one of the reasons. I cannot know you. You sit in your house running your mouth on social media and you put actual people in danger. 

Wondering when we'll see pundits focus on the white voting block that looked at all of the shit from the past four years and said this is fine. Choosing whiteness over every other thing in this world like we've been doing for all time while telling others we don't discuss race. If this makes you recoil or uncomfortable, something within you knows this is true, that we've all been complicit in it, and the thought of fixing this is overwhelming. I'm right there with you. If you are pissed off at me or defensive or thinking not everything is about race when you're reading this, you are hearing the indoctrination of the white supremacist and patriarchal systems we were raised in and it is reverberating in you and you are conditioned to tune me out or turn on me. You can come at me over it, I don't give a good shit. We can do this all day long. By the way, democrats and republicans fall into both of the above categories. No one has the market on either. Women have internalized misogyny. Black people have internalized racism. There's a lot of work for most of us to do. Much more work than posting black squares on Instagram and saying we're listening. Guess what? Saying you like people and voting against them is doing irreparable harm. If you are ready to sit in this uncomfortable space and begin to really examine this, follow Bree Newsome Bass on Twitter (go back and start reading from Election Day on) and read every slide of this thread on Instagram. Read and sit with it. Discuss it within yourself. Then sit with it some more. 

Thanking family and friends and volunteers and staff who worked on MFD's campaign on Election Day itself and before and after it. I'm ready to be done with everything. The wife of a candidate who is done campaigning is a dangerous thing. Soon we'll talk about my neighbors two doors down surveilling us and reporting on us on neighborhood facebook pages (literally taking photos and making up stories about what is shown in the photos) and naming names. I support my husband and I think he would be great in service to the people of our district and the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. I did not support a second run for office though, and it's because of shit like that. People like my neighbors think this is a game and this is actually my fucking life. And posting all of this shit about my home on facebook endangers ME. The private citizen living in the house NOT running for office. I am fucking furious.  These are the only two photos I took on Election Day - friend and volunteer Morgan and my Dad & Carol. We also did a family pic with MFD's brother, sister, and nephew but I don't have that one. Thanks to all who showed us kindness in any way in a very fucking unkind time. I didn't write about campaigning this time and mostly stayed out of it in another state for many reasons - my house was needed as campaign headquarters, and it was safer here at the shore for me versus in Philly with very un-neighborly neighbors filming and photographing and watching everything because they have nothing better to do and place more weight on having a tight flower bed out front than not having hate in their hearts. Imagine being such a shitty, soulless neighbor that you actively make your neighbors feel hunted every time they step out their front door, that you question Black people in cars near their house. We won't even get into the petty shit like not shoveling out a parking spot on the street when it snows and then parking in other people's spots. But, that's all a story for another day. Maybe after I have the sign made for my flower bed letting the neighborhood know the family is stalking us. I'm the do we have a problem? Let's discuss it, neighbor neighbor. But you put my life on the internet without consent? I can do that too. And I have a wider reach. 

Sharing this for anyone feeling sad or discouraged. For those of you who still thought America was better than this. Lay it all down - the things inside of you that say you should or shouldn't do or say something. Let if fuel radical love. Let it propel us all toward justice. 

Listening to Atlantic City by Bruce Springsteen (it's the lyric after the hyphen in the title)

Watching nothing, but I keep meaning to watch the last season of Schitt's Creek. 

Reading not too fucking much, my friends. I've been "reading" the same book for two weeks. It's wild. This has never happened to me before. Ever. Work, politics, the state of the world are all to blame. So I'll be showing up for Show Us Your Books Tuesday but mainly just to host it. See you there. 

Laughing because man, fuck it all right now

Hang in there. Biden is winning this. That won't solve anything in and of itself, but it will make it easier since you won't have to concern yourself with what fucking wild shit your president is tweeting every day. It also makes a clearer path forward. That path does not include you sticking your head back in the sand and disengaging from community issues and politics. Get ready to work. 

Why it's important to unplug every now and then

The irony of a title like that on a post you need to read while plugged in, on the day after an Election that had most of us glued to the phone/computer/TV despite our best efforts not to be, no? Anyway. I thought we could use this reminder today of all days. 

To most people, the fact that we’re so connected is a net positive. Especially in a year where we have been discouraged from face to face gatherings so we can slow the rate of infection during a global pandemic. Being so connected means we get to keep in touch with people a lot more easily, to learn and explore other perspectives, and to connect with others across the world on any topic under the sun. However, there’s no denying that there’s a lot that can be missed if we don’t take the time to unplug once in a while. Here are some reasons you should schedule some time away from the screens in your life.

You need face-time with the people that you love

There are naturally some pretty big barriers to getting a lot of family time in 2020, with smart people taking precautions against the ongoing global health pandemic. However, if you’re taking precautions to be as safe as possible, it’s important to water your relationships with the face-to-face time that they need even though that his hopefully a much much much smaller circle of people than you would normally do that with. There is no replacement for face to face connection. Most of us have felt that keenly this year. Go about it safely. Ask questions where people have been and how they have been masking like you are interrogating a suitor who could also be a serial killer. 

Shut out the voices once in a while

If you’re active on social media, on the blogosphere, or in any other big online communities, is is sometimes overwhelming to constantly be at the whim of a barrage of thoughts, hot takes, and full-blown editorials from all corners of your online community. Apps like these ones shown at Inc can help you put timed blockers on things like social media. For one, it helps you take a break from those voices, but it also helps you be more in the moment without constantly checking your phone. There are also about a zillion of you out there who need to turn off all of your notifications. 

Get outside

The natural world has a lot to offer in terms of improving your mood, busting your stress, and offering some real physical health benefits. Even getting into something as seemingly mundane as fishing with Tailored Tackle and such can help you get a much deeper appreciation of nature, the kind that simply can't be fostered by looking at it through a monitor. GET OUTSIDE. Breathe fresh air, look at the sky, engage in some landscape photography (if you use your phone for pics like I do, my tip/trick is to put it in airplane mode so it's merely a camera, not a phone), ground your feet into the earth, and just freaking BE. Be out there until your shoulders come down out of your ears. Bask in the sun, walk in the rain, sit and be still. Whatever. Go outside. Every day if you are able. 

Sit with yourself

Aside from spending time with your family, you should also consider spending time with yourself. I love to be alone, so much. I wish more people grasped how great alone time is for your mind and spirit. Getting right with who you are is the foundation for so much. If you need some help getting right with yourself and something like mediation interests you, learn practices via Gaiam that can teach you to spend a lot more time with your own thoughts. You can learn how you tick, get some perspective on your own challenges and stresses, and even address some habits that you have had a hard time getting under control. Simply put, being so online all of the time can stop us from focusing on our own internal worlds, which usually isn’t a good thing.

No one is suggesting that we all do away with all of the screens in our lives. Well, some might. But for those looking for more rational courses of action in a world where we will likely never get rid of social media, the above tips might help you disconnect enough to feel more balanced and whole without a screen.

Be good to yourself today, friends. 

TWTW - the one with the family celebrations

Friday I worked until about 1, then we headed to my cousin's wedding. Everything was beautiful and I'm glad they could get married in this shitfire of a pandemic. We appreciated being at our own table spaced well away and masked in common areas when not eating or drinking or snapping a quick pic. If you can survive the sometimes stress of wedding planning quadrupled by a pandemic, you can probably survive everything. Congratulations Kristine & Walter! Thanks to Aubrey for being the lipstick holder and my family for a night filled with laughs in a time when I could really use them. 

Saturday I was not even in my first cup of coffee before campaign whirlwind descended. They finally all took off for the day and I hung with the dogs, ran to the store, checked out the amazing trees in my neighborhood like I do every year, and consoled Mae while MFD gave an interview in the living room. I made sweet and sour meatballs, a vat of onion dip, cut up veggies, and did laundry. 

I also packaged Halloween candy individually. We set up a little different this year but we were still out there giving out, masked up when close to the table. MFD did do his live pumpkin carving, decorated the railing and window literally at 6:30 pm, the dogs were window creeps and frantically trying to get to use in the driveway, and we hung out with our shared driveway neighbors so some things did not change. We were closed up by 9 and watched The Witches of Eastwick, which I love. 

Sunday Freaking Bruce was up at 4:42 due to DST. I never went back to sleep, but I did lay down and rest for a while. I tried to read but kept getting distracted. I've been reading the same book for over a week. I painted my nails (Zoya Indigo) and caught a half hour of a Northeast Anti-Racism call before heading into my Dad & Carol's for tacos and memory and cake for my Dad's birthday.

Which is today. Happy birthday Dad! Love you so much, thank you for being who you are in general and who you are as a Dad to me, specifically. 

Everyone else out there - have you voted or do you have a voting plan for tomorrow? People's lives are literally on the line and I need you to make a plan to vote if you have not. To those of you out there who are stressed the fuck out right now. I get it. I am literally living inside of a smaller Election in the shadow of this Election of our lifetimes. So I truly get it. Hang in there. We're going to be okay. 

Friday Five 10.30.2020

 
1. I made my first soup of the season yesterday - a simple vegetarian eight can soup (rotel with mild green chiles, petite diced tomatoes, corn, green beans, Campbell's vegetable soup, sliced whole potatoes, mixed veggies, vegetarian chili beans = don't drain any of the liquids) with some veggie base and spices of course. I doubled everything to make a larger batch. This freezes well. 

2. For over a year I have made hard boiled eggs via air fryer and will never make them another way again. They come out perfect every time and I don't have to babysit them. After pre-heating, I put eight or nine in my air fryer, and cook at 260 for 15 minutes. 

3. I love outtake photos. My old dogs this morning with Maedop's tongue out.

4. New shore art from AlmaBoheme. It coordinates with my newest tattoo and with the shore house logo TWSSQuoteShop did for me. 

5. I am comfortable recommending this to everyone. I have sensitive skin and it's okay for me. It is a beautiful experience. I put it on like a scrub and leave it on for five minutes, then rinse and carry on with my nightly routine. I use it three times a week. If you are a TJ shopper, don't sleep on this. 

Happy weekend to you all, be safe TOTing if you're doing that or handing out candy - mask up and don't crowd! - and happy wedding day to my cousin Kristine!