Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Talking about ice, books, shitting on The Vine, and other crap on Haphazard Wednesday


Ready, set go. 

As if Haphazard Wednesday thoughts weren't taxing enough to follow, we're going to start today off with...MATH. I've mentioned math on here twice since Friday. Help.  


1. This weekend, I got this photo in an email from my BFF Laura at 10:45 p.m. on Saturday night. The following conversation ensued:

Laura: I just did this to figure out the dimension of a cabinet. Holler. 
Me: I think I just had a seizure. What sort of voodoo math is that?
Laura: Pythagorean theorem. no joke. Needed it to calculate a corner cabinet.
Me: You just casually engaged the Pythagorean theory on Saturday night at 10:45. It's like we are from two different planets.
Laura: Yes yes I did.
Me: Could you have googled this?
Laura: Googled what? Its a corner in chris's house and the cabinet width is 40 inches so I had to figure out how much of the wall it would take up
Me: I don't know. I'm lost. I can't think right since I saw that voodoo math.

The moral of the story: Math hurts your brain and sometimes it doesn't work again right away. I'm sorry if any of your brains were hurt during your exposure to math while reading this blog. 

2. The Vine. ANOTHER outlet to take time away from real life. I blog to write - not to video myself. That's called Me In Real Life. My voice is awful, you will never catch me vlogging or putting videos of myself anywhere on the world wide webs. Plus, I'm grateful enough that you read what sometimes passes as surface drivel here. I don't want to push videos of me just uh...being me. Isn't that what I'm doing on these pages without the added annoyance of my voice or having to click on a video? Although I wouldn't mind if GIFS were all relegated to Vine, because then I'd never have to see them. Things that move repeatedly make me dizzy. Give me a video to click on any day. Plus, they distract me from reading and the point they were inserted to emphasize is totally lost. HONEY BADGER DON'T GIVE A SHIT.
Source
3. My friend Lauren just started a blog, Confessions of a Domestic Wannabe. Check her out! Since we're talking about confessions, I confess I'd love to live in Gwen's neighborhood. Read about her YAHTZEE fun today on Confessions of a Gila Monster. Shelby's talking about how fresh coffee is king today on Big Hungry Shelby. I love reading my friend's blogs because I can hear their voices so well through their writing.

4. I have an addiction, and that addiction is ice. Not hielo like Dog The Bounty Hunter is always despairing over. Real ice. Ice from a machine. The happiest day I had in years was when I moved into a house with an ice maker after six years of living in apartments without one. I like to fill my cups to the brim with ice. Ice ice baby.  ANYWAY. The second happiest day of my life has arrived. I've been at my job for almost five years. We've never had an ice machine here. Last week, we got one! OH HAPPY DAY. Thank you universe and gods of ice. 



5. Yes, I did just spend six lines talking about ice. Jesus Christmas. ANYWAY. What kind of fool starts an engrossing book at 10 p.m.? This fool. Here's what I'm reading: 


Source
6. Yesterday I almost bit it at the top of the escalator as I was coming up from the train platform. It was slippery as hell. My foot slipped allllll the way out in front of me until I was doing a half assed split. It was awful. I caught myself, but Christ! My lifelong battle with escalators continues. That kid is playing on the escalator again! I feel you, Brody. 

7. This girl is scary as f&ck on The Following. Cold blooded psycho.


Source
8. Something very serious and historical is going to happen tonight. I am taking one small step for women, and one giant step for womankind. I am going to Target and I'm not spending money on superfluous items. My list of needs: soap for MFD, toothpaste, shaving cream, Gain liquid laundry detergent, suede shoe protector, gift cards for giveaways. I am also exchanging stupid boring black flats for sleek peachy flats. I will get an illicit thrill from this act. I will not pay attention to dish towels, stationary, candles, clearance baubles, scarves, or anything else. I will resist the siren songs of the clearance racks. I will triumph!!!

9. THANK YOU UNIVERSE FOR THE 60 DEGREE WEATHER FORECAST FOR TODAY. Sixty degrees on a haphazard January Wednesday in Philadelphia? Hallelujah, HOLLER, and amen.

10. Ecard of the week. Sorry hipster friends, this made me laugh and laugh. 



Come back tomorrow to talk about Productivity with a capital P. 

Now, good day. I SAID GOOD DAY.










Linking up with Shanna for Random Wednesday. 

34 comments:

  1. HAHA... I'm laughing at your ice victory. ***Side note: I hate ice unless it's the little balls from Sonic or Zaxbys.*** And that math picture... yeah, it just gave me a headache! =) Have a great Wednesday!

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOVE Honey Badger!

    I will never recover from my fear, nay PHOBIA of escalators. Never.

    And when they tolds us as kids that we would use those math skills, who believed them? And yet we do, regularly. Luckily for me, I always loved math and my mind is like a steel trap for remembering all those theorems and rules. Fun!

    Good luck at Target... how much longer til you can spend foolishly?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm trying to not spend foolishly ever again, but I know that's a pipe dream. February 15 is the cutoff for this freeze. I will go until March 18 without a strict freeze in place and see how I do, but I'll still record what I spend. Another actual freeze will be in effect again in March.

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    2. I don't have the escalator fear, but I do have one of revolving doors. It stems from a 6th grade field trip to Pittsburgh in which John D. pushed me while in the revolving door and my ankle got caught and I fell face first on the sidewalk.

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  3. I will take the blame for the voice. I do not think you are as The Nanny-nasal as I am. Also, the escalator- I was always afraid we would get sucked into the escalator and ride them with a bit of fear, too. Icemakers are one of my favorite things, especially since NO ONE would EVER refill the ice tray. You and I are also ice-baggers! And of course, the math situation.
    Godspeed in avoiding the sales at the Target.
    Enjoying the warmth, happy to have the garage to wipe my muddy pups before they come in.

    Love you! your MOMMA

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I probably do get The Voice from you and my proclivity for ice. Remember when I almost bit it on the escalator at The Contemporary in Disney? Chuck had to catch me. eeeeeeeeeeeee. Awful.

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    2. my more vivid & horror of a memory is when you were lost at the River Country during the thunder and lightening storm!!!

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  4. Vine = dumb! Enough said. I can hardly keep up w/ the social media I'm on. And yay to warm weather today. Only wish I wasn't in work! Have a great day.

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  5. I heart the pythagorean theorem. That picture made my heart race a little bit. In a good way. Mad props to your BFF. You're not an ice chomper, are you?

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  6. Thanks for the link, SMD! I love reading my friends blogs for the same reason, and I wish more of them would start them! But the math is a little much, no? ;)

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  7. I wish Ice was my addiction. then I wouldn't be so fat. The vine? stupid. dumb. and nice weather always makes me sing hallelujah.

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  8. Thanks for the mention! You're my inspiration!!! PS That girl is crazy creepy!

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  9. I am one of the folks without a smartphone - so when everyone is all APPS (that's what the vine is, right?)...I'm outta the loop. I'm kind of okay with this. There are too many social media sites as it is.

    Hellllllo Honey Badger!

    And the Ecard is hilarious.

    It's in the 50s here today in upstate NY. Not cool at all. Everyone is all excited and I'm over here like...Lake Ontario is thawing and that means on Friday when it's 16 degrees, we are going to get lake effect snow out the booty.

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  10. I love Laura anyway, but I kinda love her even more when she does shit like that. LOL

    I just recently read about this Vine thing and I'm with you. No thank you. I don't mind watching videos when it's necessary, or if it's Sweet Brown, but even when I'm on CNN and click on a story, I DON'T WANT TO WATCH A VIDEO, I WANT TO READ ABOUT IT.

    Phew. Sorry about that.

    Thanks for the shoutout!

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  11. I respectfully request that you show your Target receipt as part of your Thurs or Fri blog ... we'll keep you honest ;-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No shame in my game! I am keeping a tally in a blog post that will come out on February 19 (I think) that lays open all of my sinful spending violations. So if it doesn't make it to a blog this week, it'll make it if I overspend!

      Delete
  12. I love ice too, I haven't had an ice maker in years :( I don't think you're going to survive this Target mission, but I wish you luck!!

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  13. Hey there! Love your blog!

    I think that girl on the Following is scary as F*ck too!! Sheeshamama!

    and Good luck on your Target trip!!!

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  14. I started watching the Following and am kinda hooked. Has a lot of potential.

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  15. Pretty sure The Following is my new favorite show. Well, next to The Vampire Diaries. Also written by Kevin Williamson. He's amazing.

    How insane was it when that crazy bitch stabbed her mom?!

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  16. Ok I just need to say. I think you are trying to kill me. This is the second Math brain explosion you have caused me. Lets couple that with the idiot in teh suite next to me who left, locked their door and they have an F-ing alarm clock going off!!! FOR ALL THE MINUTES BEEP BEEP BEEP!!!!!! Check me in to the nearest looney bin STAT! AND who brings an alarm clock to work!?!?!?!?!?!?

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  17. I am so sick of all the VINE-hype on Instagram. Don't we already have enough social networking going on in life? Where do these people find all this time??! I blog{sometimes}, facebook{occasionally} and instagram.. that alone is way too time consuming!

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  18. The following was way too gruesome for me. Had to shut off the first episode when the girls stabbed herself 20 minutes into the show. Defending Jacob was an awesome book- enjoy!!

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  19. I know 60 degree weather so crazy! Math! OMG I am do tired right now I can even contemplate math egads

    Ali of

    www.dressingken.com

    ReplyDelete
  20. "That's called Me In Real Life" i literally laughed out loud at this. in fact, just reading it again is making me giggle. i love it.
    also, remember the show 'rescue 911'? there was an episode where a little kid got sucked into the escalator by his pants and my sister REFUSED to get on them after that. im pretty sure it took her like 10 years to get over the fear. goddamn rescue 911 filled my childhood with irrational fears haha

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  21. girl, I just watched the first episode of the following and I'm unsure if I can continue. I used to be so into crime shows but i just felt cold and hurt from watching them...so i just started reading fashion blogs instead! my coworker told me i had to watch it and so i watched the first one and it made me scared and sad...but like i need to know what happens. we'll see if i watch the second episode. maybe during broad daylight...

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  22. I'm with you on Vine. I even hate videos on news sites. I can read faster than they get to the point in their videos. Mmmm…ice. Haha! How's the book? It's on my list. I have The Following saved up on TiVo. I'm waiting for a good time for Jacob and I to watch it together. BTW, I just finished Homeland season 1 and I love it!!

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