Thursday, June 28, 2012

Thursday Thoughts

1. All aboard for Asshole Island! Asshole Island's newest resident is Joe Amendola. To be flippant and jokey after your client is convicted of heinous crimes? Joe, you are completely inappropriate and disgusting. Have some decorum.


2. I've been using this beach/pool bag for over six years. The inside zipper is broken. I can't comfortably carry it on my shoulder and that's annoying when you're walking to a beach. It's time for a new one...yet I can't quit this bag.

3. I'm sure the neighborhood is happy that we finally weeded (for over two hours), mulched for the fiftieth time, and did a general cleanup out front. It was totally nicka - neer - neer - neer - neer - neer - neer - neer out there. I finally put a garden flag on my flag pole that's been up for over a year.

4. A free concert right outside of my building yesterday made me think of how great it would be to walk outside to live music every day. But no Dave Matthews please.

I always love the lone dancer. This guy wasn't just walking, he was noodle dancing.

5. I had a midweek pick-me-up surprise when one of my favorite people (Gail) was in the area and we had an impromptu dinner at On The Border. Ole, mofos.

6. Do you think Chef Ramsay is tired of seeing and saying scallops? I'm tired of scallops.


7. The flipping towel rack on the back of the bathroom door up and fell off this week. Last June I came home to find the mirror shattered on the floor and two of the tiles knocked out of the wall in this same bathroom. Maybe our bathroom has a haint in June. Or maybe our dogs grow hands when we're not there and tear shit up in the bathroom. I don't know. Either way I'm ready to take a sledgehammer to the entire bathroom and start from scratch.

8. When one is foolish enough to half ass it at the gym for two weeks in a row and skip the third week entirely, one should expect everything to be hurty when one returns on the fourth week. I feel like Randy in A Christmas Story, only I can't put my arms UP.


9. My basil, parsley and cilantro are all puny this year.

10. I think this is one zillion percent true. I hate when people blame everyone and everything for their problems, but never recognize the part they play in them, and never do anything to solve them. Albert Ellis, if you're alive, you're invited to dinner.

11. I saw a recipe yesterday on a blog for haricots verts with grape tomatoes. I started laughing like a loon because I used to pronounce haricots verts phonetically. MFD heard me a number of years ago, laughed until he nearly died and told me how it was supposed to be pronounced. Now every time I see it I pronounce it phonetically in my head and laugh like a psycho.

Photo & recipe from

12. I ordered two Zoya nail polishes yesterday. I couldn't help it. It's toxin-free. It goes on well and lasts for a long time. Thanks to Jill for introducing me to it! I got Perrie and Pandora.

Both photos from

13. If anyone needs marriage, divorce, or parenting advice, this conductor doles it out like he was Moses on the mountain getting his information directly from God.

14. Gratuitous dog photos: Gussie and his monkey and the most spoiled dogs in the universe sleeping in while the people of the house are up and about.

15. Favorite ecard of the week:

Today begins a seven day heat wave in the Pennsy area. Can you feel the joy radiating from my pores?

Today is also my brother-in-law Mark's birthday. Love you Marcus Aurelius, have a wonderful day!

As for the rest of you...stay gold, Ponyboy.

Monday, June 25, 2012

the weekend that was

Prelude to a fabulous lightning storm. Geege was not pleased.


Gross dinner at O'Donnell's followed by a trip to MFD's favorite store - the Polo outlet.
His wardrobe is literally worth 5x mine.


Magazines galore


Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy from the Redbox. MFD's pick, he enjoyed it.
I was fast asleep on the couch within 20 minutes.


Did you guys know there's a show on Biography called I Killed My BFF?
I am intrigued.
Monday (tonight) at 10 p.m. 


Sandusky found guilty.
Hallelujiah and amen.


Woken up at the crack of dawn Saturday by the Ahole Wakeup Committee.
This led to early morning hausfrauing and leaving the house before 7:30 a.m.
Which led me to a large iced coffee at DD.


Seeing a hoagie roll delivery is a good way to start the day


Visits with Grandmom, Gamma and Pop

I scored two cucumbers from Pop's garden

I got both dogs in the pool

Geege takes a dip

Maxin' and relaxin'


Beers out back under my favorite tree with MFD, Greg and Effing Warren.
And a thrown together summer dinner:
MFD's grilled pork tenderloin, cucumber salad, fresh salsa, baked potatoes.

Beer on ice is very nice


Saturday evening stroll around Parkwood to hang out with friends


A sighting of the International Space Station and a good time over on Barbary Place


Food prep for the week, including making my own ranch dressing


A swim and a catnap pool side on the zero gravity lounge chair
Yogi on his step

1. I love these tumblers, which I buy at Marshalls, natch.
2. I love ketchup, but I think ketchup on hotdogs is wrong.
Peters disagrees, as evidenced by her hotdog.


Caught up on Teen Mom. Amber, you are 10 ways to crazy.
A new episode of True Blood. For the love of Pete TAKE TARA OFF THIS SHOW!
Aholes setting fireworks off riling Geege up so I had to listen to incessant barking for three hours.

the weekend that was

This was a true summer weekend, most of it spent outside and perfumed with sunscreen and bug spray. Languid, heavy limbed, sun kissed, slow moving. A nice respite from the busy, places to be weekends. More please. 

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Thursday Thoughts

1. The past three weeks have been insane in the membrane. I've cancelled all plans for this weekend so I can have a do nothing weekend. It's long overdue and desperately needed, we've had something going on every weekend since what feels like the beginning of time but is probably actually just April. I'm going to get my shit together, try some new recipes, pop in to see my grandparents, and RELAX.


2. Here's something else that's insane in the membrane: this breath sucking, awful, hideous, shiteous heat. Take it back. Whoever sent it, just take it back.  Liquid hot magma. Go away.


3. Doesn't this photo look reminiscent of Friday Night Lights? It was taken from Neshaminy High School's football field, but it totally could've been taken in Dillon, Texas. Or did Coach Taylor really move to Philadelphia? When is someone buying me the entire Friday Night Lights series on DVD?

4.  I don't think I can adequately put into words the rage and disbelief I have in Michigan State Rep Lisa Brown being banned from speaking on the House floor for a day after using the word vagina in an argument about an anti-abortion bill. ARE YOU KIDDING ME MICHIGAN? IT IS THE NAME OF A BODY PART AND IT WAS USED IN AN ARGUMENT ABOUT EVERYONE'S INTENSE INTEREST IN CONTROLLING THAT BODY PART. Vagina is not a dirty word, you fucking morons.

This makes me so angry I get all SUFFERIN' SUCCOTASH flustered.

Thank you Eve Ensler and all the others who busted a move out to Michigan  for an impromptu performance of The Vagina Monologues this Monday night on the steps of the state house.


Image: AP
5. Take note.

6. I simply cannot get enough of summer salads made with orzo. I've been concocting all kinds of awesome things.

7. TV time: Last night I took some time to catch up on Girls. I also watched the first two episodes of True Blood - Tara, go away. And I finally watched the season finale of The Killing. Holy shitskies. I didn't see that coming.

8. Jessica Biel, I'd like to talk to you about the bangs that are clearly hurting your soul. It's time to let them go. Call me.


9. I think you should read this book.
10. Ecard of the week.

One more day. I can do this. Stay hydrated, people.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Summer Playlist

Hark! Today is the first day of summer. Here are some songs on my summer playlist:

4th of July, Asbury Park (Sandy) - Bruce Springsteen
Around the Way Girl - Ladies Love Cool James
Baba O'Reilly - The Who
Beechwood 4-5789 - The Marvelettes
The Boys of Summer - Don Henley
Candy's Room - Bruce Springsteen

Centerfield - John Fogerty
Cruisin' - Smokey Robinson
Cry to Me - Solomon Burke
Farewell My Summer Love - Michael Jackson
Fool in the Rain - Led Zeppelin
Girls in their Summer Clothes - Bruce Springsteen
Go All the Way - Eric Carmen
Groovin' - The Young Rascals
Gypsy - Fleetwood Mac
Hey Jude - Wilson Pickett version
I'm No Angel - The Gregg Allman Band
Into the Mystic - Van Morrison
Into the Night - Benny Mardones
It's All Right - The Impressions
Jungle Love - Steve Miller Band
Keep on Lovin' You - REO Speedwagon
Keeping the Faith - Billy Joel
Lido Shuffle - Boz Scaggs
Make Me Lose Control - Eric Carmen
Maria - Blondie
Mary's Place - Bruce Springsteen
Me & Bobby McGee - Janis Joplin
Me & My Girlfriend - JayZ & Beyonce
Mercedes Boy - Pebbles
My Old School - Steely Dan
Mystery - Indigo Girls
Night Moves - Bob Seger
Nightswimming - REM
Oh Darling - Supertramp
On My Own - Patti LaBelle
On the Darkside - John Cafferty
On the Way to Cape May - Al Alberts
Once Bitten, Twice Shy - Great White
Patriot - Pearl Jam
Raspberry Beret - Prince
Read My Mind - The Killers
Rock-n-Roll Girls - John Fogerty
Sex on Fire - Kings of Leon
Shama Lama Ding Dong - Otis Day and the Knights
She's a Rainbow - The Rolling Stones
Sherry Darling - Bruce Springsteen
Sloop John B - The Beach Boys
Stone in Love - Journey
Strawberry Wine - Deanna Carter
Sugar, We're Goin' Down - Fall Out Boy
Sugar Magnolia - Grateful Dead
Summer Wind - Frank Sinatra
Sweet Soul Music - Arthur Conley
Take it to the Limit - The Eagles
Take me to the Pilot - Elton John
This is How We Do It - Montell Jordan
Untouchable Face - Ani Difranco
Visions of Paradise - Mick Jagger
Wildwood Days - Bobby Rydell
You Send Me - Sam Cooke
You Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth - Meat Loaf
You Wear it Well - Rod Stewart
You Wreck Me - Tom Petty

Peace out.

Isn't She Lovely

When I was born,  Isn't She Lovely by Stevie Wonder was popular. It was written for Stevie's daughter, and it always makes my mom think of me. We danced to it at my wedding. It also makes me think of her.

Today my mom is 56. She's at peace in her life, she strives to be her best self daily, and she has strong belief in the power of positive thought. It's a good time to be her, especially since her and Rich just put a salt water cement pool in, which she refers to as a healing ocean oasis (HOO).

As she often says, thoughts are things. From her I've learned to put good ones out there as much as I can. She also always reminds me to be grateful for every little thing. She's very different from the mom I had growing up to the person she is now. She's slowed down a bit to smell the roses, she's more serene and tries not to sweat the small stuff.

It's interesting how your relationship with your parents changes as you grow older. The're not just your parents - they are people, just like you, with strengths and weaknesses. They are not perfect, and if they were good parents, they taught you that you weren't expected to be either.

My mom is wonderfully eccentric and has the nickname Loopy to match. She wears a hair mane she still has from the 1980s. She drinks asti spumante and likes to toast. She busts out in spontaneous cheers she remembers from her high school days. You could say she's a bit of a character. 

Hair mane, clutching wine glass, Down on the Redskin Reservation cheer
She tweets. She can twirl a fire baton. She loves babies and is a great mom mom to Colin and Riley. She loves "her songs." She never wants to run out of anything, and she always has a lot of food and drink at parties - I get it from her. She loves to take sleeping pictures of people.

Mom & Kit Kat D, Sleeping at her 50th birthday shore weekend
If she could, my mom would never leave her house - she is happy and content there. She'd also love for all of her chickens to live on that street. She brings my dogs bones and cut up hotdogs when she visits them. She always gets an updo for weddings. She is not comfortable being a passenger in the car with any of her children.

At Tiffany's wedding, with two of my favorite people at mine
My mom is a good cook and an excellent baker. I'd rather eat something she bakes than anything from a store. She's Durham Deli's number one customer. She's a wonderful hostess and is the only person I've ever seen bring a lace tablecloth to a tailgate.

My mom putting a lace tablecloth on a card table at the Manchester U game in 2003
-We are all God's children.
-I'm hellbent for election.
- <curse> Pardon my french.
-I light you all every day.
-Eating like I'm going to the chair.
-Just shoot me.
-JMJ (Jesus, Mary and Joseph)
-Don't go to the bathroom alone (she says this when you're going out, not when you're at home)
-Beware of chloroform
-I haven't ___________ since Hector was a pup (to imply a long time).
-Whatever you say you are.
-Be-you-tee-ful for beautiful
-Ween for wine
-GFY (the nice way to say go .... yourself)

My mother carried three children over nine pounds, and none of us look like her. I have her mannerisms and her nasal voice, but that's all. She raised me to be a strong woman, confident in myself, self-sufficient, and sure that I could do anything I set out to do.

When I think of my mom, I think of love, peace signs, white lights, perfume, Adidas outfits, light, hair manes, candles, flowers, and baked goods.

It's not easy to write about your parents. They knew you when you were just a wish, they see you in all of your phases, they love you through it, whatever it is. I talk to my mom every day. When I thought about writing something for her birthday, nothing came. It's too hard to put something down without thinking you're forgetting something huge, that you won't say what you really mean and will miss the mark. Then I thought hello, she's my mom. Someone who has a scent I would know anywhere. In the end it's not the big things that paint a picture of who someone is. It's the little quirks and scraps of information piled up over the years. Those little details are what I love the most. It's a privilege to know the small things about someone.

Happy birthday mom. I love you.

p.s. Happy birthday to my cousin Ashley, my mom's birthday friend.

p.p.s. Good luck today Gwen! I'm thinking of you

p p infinity s: make this:

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